432. Best 11

pocketeers,

the last time someone tagged me was like

centuries ago and he/she must have died off to

live in the permanent afterlife already.

ok that was rude for me to say right!?

ok i take that back ^^

anyway, thanks to Mya the lady from this post :

399. HowToFollow Like Dis?

i was tag! waaahhh... well i guess its not

wrong for me to do this once a while :)

so here goes ^^

The Rules:

-No Retagging.

-To clearly state this rules when posting.

-Tag 11 people and link them

-make sure they know (Well of course kan)

-write 11 things about u in the entry.

-answer all the question from your 'tagger'

-produce another 11 questions for the next one

inline to answer.

-this is to know blogger more, and not to

matchmaking people or public profiling :)

11 things about the Pocket.

1)Blood type : A

2)luve milo

3)hate flying regardless of the frequent chance i have.

4)chocolate!! but make it daaaarrrkkkkk...

5)cant say i luv camwhoring, maybe if my body

look like hugh jackman, it'll be different

though. ohhoohoo

6)Rabun, so if u'r waving to me, make sure i

know who u are. or else u'll think i'm sombong.

7)having problem with remembering names.

8)get ticked off easily.

9)my work is effecting my daily life. i'm now a

guy who would complain if there's blood in my

nando's chicken and would insist for a

replacement. ohh..

10)not so good missmatching my baju seluar.

that guy with the long sleeve, cargo half pants

and sports shoe is me.

11)favourite criteria in ladies appearance

would be : short hair (Like previous post

lady), with obvious collar bone wearing long

skirt.

is it too much to ask?

11 question to answer:

1) full Name : albert pocket kuruentulesque

(With the last name pronounced as kuruentuleski)

2) bakat terpendam?: i previously did played the guitar,

not very good though, wanted to play on the street,

but quit the dream as i dont know any original song...

3) what do i like about myself?:

hooh la.. what do i like about myself ya?

4) when and why did u started blogging?:

i started blogging from 2006, why?

well i got some story that i could not tell

anyone on my side. that is why i'm telling it to you :D

5) till when are the pocket going to blog?

i am not sure. but there are saying

'quit when u'r at the top' i guess

i'm still a long way there so ....

6) Blog whatabout?:

well my blog is about ideas and feelings people

kept in their deepest part of their heart.

7) Favourite Blog? : quite a lot!! but if i'm listing

them down, then it'll be unfair for those whom

i forgot to list down.

so best if i leave this one unattended :)

8) la la la la la ...

9) what do i think about Mya's blog?

i am not sure yet, cause i'm still in the

progress of stalking her :) heheheh

10) feelings when tagged? :

relief, oh i got something to post tonite!! :)

11) time taken to reply this tag:

about 3 hours!! cause the housemate kept on bugging me ohh!!

tagging anyone?

hummm... aaaa....

i guess i'll leave this tagging part for someone else to do :)

i'm just the one who do the tag, not the one who's taggin :D

how was your monday

anyway pocketeers?

having fun yet?

431. Gadis Tenggelam Dlm BathTub...

...kira satu tajuk yang patutnya meletup lah kan...

meletup tak?

AyaqMasak.. i know u hate Avril,

but let me repost something like

this again okeh:)

Pocketeers,

post ni lambat sikit.

actually terhilang dalam folder bertajuk

'DRAFT FOR THE POCKET'

sila layan jugak biarpun lagu ni dah lama ^^

its about that song from Avril Lavigne

with the title 'Wish U were Here'

if the video above is not there... just

search for it in the Youtube okeh :D

o:o7 cantik nya lighting,

back light, rambut terlight up sikit,

amat lah lawa photographic nyer...

lantai pakir!

mana datang nya sumber cahaya

kat dinding belakang kanan tu?

0:43 bunga tu ada kerosene ..

basuh tangan yer sebelum makan.

kang sakit perut lak.

00:21 'shit' tu ada bunyi 'ts' kat ujung

tu kan.. pocket suka itu dalam sebutan

adik ni. (Sebelum ni pun sebut dah pasal

ni disini : 50. EnglishOriented)

0:53, bagi pocket, tali tu kalau longgar

memang la 'seksa', ohhh..:D

1:00 tak yah tarik balik lagi dik..

1:08 dah tarik dah? bila tarik?

1:17 jangan la nangis dik..

kang abang nangis gak kang!

celak tu jahat, sajer je nak

bagi air mata tu obvious lagi kan?

1:30 'we always say, say like it is?'

A flick of the tongue differs

u from a true english pronunciation

and ..well malaysian english.

1:37 alah muncung sikit tu yg tak tahan,

comel la comel, kang abang tampor jugak

kang punya la comel.. huh

'damn! damn! what i'd do to have u here...'

sebutan dia macam buleh dengar dia

habiskan perkataan 'damn' tu ngan

bunyi 'n'... yang ni pocket suka..

2:02 menghempas kan diri ke lantai bagai

merajuk. Macam selalu tengok nii...

lelaki sila cam yer, selain hentak kaki,

ini tanda tanda maksima utk wanita merajuk

okeh :D

2:56 tangan elok elok yang dik taruk tatoo tu

buat apa? tahik lalat lagi orang nak buang,

kamu gi rosakkan kulit indah ciptaan tuhan..

sayang la sayang.. tak?

Message of this post :

1) sila sebut english ngan betulnya, baru lah indah.

2) sila jangan rosakkan kulit yang indah anugerah tuhan.

3) sila pakai celak...comel!!

4) sila muncung kalau merajuk.. comel gak!!

tak der kena mengena kan.. ohh.. monday post.

430. Tengok tudung tu.. comel kan,

Pocketeers,

soalan mudah,

soalan betul punyer nak tahu.

post pendek.

Camana nak bagi tau cik adik

kita yang kita suka pompuan

berambut gini gitu,

(i want to put a picture of the

girl with the 'head' i love but

if she's reading this then it'll

look like i'm meng'gatal'ing)

Compare ngan kakak ni kira gatal tak?

or kita ada fetish sikit

ngan pompuan berskirt

panjang gini gitu,

or kita suka sidia yang

bertudung gini gitu.

the worst was,

kita suka awek yg berwajah

anak mami gini gitu.

Tanpa berbunyi bagai membandingkan.

Tanpa berbunyi bagai,

'Kalau kamu tak wat rambut gini,

aku mungkin akan berpikir dua kali

tentang hubungan kita'.

Tanpa berbunyi macam gatal.

Pasal memang tak pun..

Come what may,

kamu nak berrambut panjang sampai

ke tulang sulbi pun.. pocket tak kisah.

Cuma..

Pocket nyer taste would be like this.

And i would like u to know dat.

lets try out..

if it happen to be nice on u,

why not make it permanent?

But let me assure u,

that even if u dont make it permanent,

i wont be going out there trying

my luck on somebody else.

am loving u just the way u are,

of course!!

u know me..

right?

...

do you?

u dont?

ohh..

anyway that is not the case here.

how do u tell your spouse that

u would like to see him in a round neck instead of a v neck,

that i would like to see her in long skirt once in a while.

without sounding too harsh or too comparing.

how ya pocketeers?

429. Thunder! Thunder! ThunderKeeetttt

'eh.. tapi Ima bukan dah tunang dah ker?'
'daahh, tapi tak jaddiiiii' dengan suara manja
macam frust dihiasi dengan bibir muncung macam
nak sedut siput sedut jer dia menjawab.
'lah kenapa plak?' Pocket ni kalau pasal orang
tak jadi ker.. pasal putus ngan BF ker,
memang lah ada lektrik sikit,
asyik nak tahuuuu jer..
macam pompuan kan :)
'entah lah, betunang 2 tahun pun
tapi dia macam tak nak usaha pun
nak bagi jadi, duit tak terkumpul pun.
nak kata gaduh selalu pun tak jugak
tapi terasa macam dah takleh teruskan
jer ngan dia, dia macam tak der
wawasan jer, tak der usaha'
tanpa bertentang mata dia explain.
sedih agak nya, terkilan agaknya..


jadi begitulah pocketeers,
syndrom tunangan orang.
bila dah tunang tu si abang terasa
macam dah booking si adik ni,
terus tak der usaha dah,
nak takutkan tekanan dari family?
kalau cik abang yang muda iyer lah,
Maybe Cik Abang tu takutkan mak bapak lagi,
kalau CikAbang nyer tu dah 35..
saper nak kacau kacau lagi?
perli perli masa makan nasik
gitu gitu jer laa kan..
Family banyak bunyik sangat?
Dia tak balik terus umah mak bapak..
laagi senang.
(pocket ada real life contoh,
tunang sampai 6 tahun.. tak kawin kawin,
tak der wit? dok gi jalan jalan sampai
bankok singapore tawau kemunting dah..)


so.. acaner nak wat? cik adik sekalian..
mari kita wat standard dimasa depan untuk
bertunang, tunangan kilat jer semua.
masa masuk meminang tu,
kad jemputan kenduri dah siap,
'Err mintak sila yer.. 14hb depan'
catering dah booking dah,
Tarikh pun dah tetap!! :)
baru la tak jadi kes macam diatas.
buang masa si pompuan jer, kesiaaan mereka
CEO selkom nak masuk meminang pun tak leh,
pasal orang kampung dok warning..
'tunangan orang tuuuu' walhal
tunggu dua tiga tahun tak jadi gak pon..


wahai cik adik sekalian.
tak rasa rugi ker?
sila bertunang kilat okeh :)
laki nak kumpul duit selepas tunang?
tak der nyer.. 2 out of 10 maybe ?
tapi kalau syarat nyer..
'tak der wit,tak der la tunang'
so anyone buleh antar tepak sirih
dan lepas akad buleh masuk dlm 'THE LIST'
of mereka yang buleh 'GOROGORO' atas tilam
Cik Adik.
(Gorogoro adalah perkataan jepun
untuk golek golek malas okeh!!
jangan pikir benda lain)


sure CikAbang panic.
Citibank punyer personal loan berapa peratus yer?
RM30K kalu 10 tahun, berapa ringgit sebulan tuu?

428. Gaji, Baby Dan Piano

ari ni sabtu,

pocket keja.

ohh..

dari orang yg tak der keja.

atleast pocket ader la gak keja kan.

kira bersyukur.

Housemate dok gila nak belajar main piano.

ohh.. samaada pocket akan pening tak leh

nak tido pas ni.. or tak pasal pasal pocket

plak yang pandai main piano..

balik kang beli headphone jom.

HEMY baru dapat baby.. congratulation bro.

moga baby ko sihat dan membesar lebih maju

dari kita semua dan harapnya pocket buleh

merasa angin angin kemajuan tersebut 40 tahun nanti..

(Iyer la kan kalau dia jadi menteri or alim

ulamak yang berpengaruh, sure pocket buleh

merasa bukan setakat angin.. malah tanah

batu ngan kayu lagi .. inshaAllaaahhhh)

tu pun kalau pocket idup lagi sampai 2051

tuu. aduhai.

kata orang, lelaki lelaki yang banyak

ber'main' dizaman bujangnya akan

dianugerahkan anak pompuan sebagai anak

sulung, kira tuhan bagi adil la. dulu ko

bagi bapak cik adik nu risau, bapak cik adik

ni susah atii.. sekarang ni merasa la kamu.

HEMY, kamu dapat baby boy kan.

kira kamu memang tak 'main' sangat lah dulu

:D

so kalau tak nak benda ni jadi betul,

sila ber'main' ngan cik adik yang ber'single

mother' sahajer yer..

(Mengarut jer pocket nih)

turned out gaji memang masuk awal,

utk mereka yg nak Deepavali katanya..

masaalah nii, gaji yang ciput ni nak ku

sebarkan ke 38 hari untuk november.

aidil adha lagi..

birthday someone lagi..

ada yang kecundang awal nih..

kedit kad oh kedit kad...

-Tahukah kamu kedit kad buleh beli cash?

-tahukah kamu nak isi minyak motor

pun buleh pakai kedit kad?

-tahukah kamu, orang semekin cam pocket

ni bila tiba 20hb, kitorang lagi mengebat.

makan mesti kat nando's ker.. pizza hut ker..

kenapa? kat situ buleh kedit kad :_)

okeh sudah lah pocketeers,

sesekali bagi pocket random post jgak yer :)

apa kata komen pun yang random random jgak.

meh kita tengok siapa lagi random ^^

427. Ke Singapore Daaahhh..

'hellooo.. ni rumah cik Farid ker?'

'iyer ni rumah farid, farid gi surau,

kak loonnnggg! tolong check kan ikan kejap,

kang hangit plak ikan mak tuu!! eheh sorry..

tengah masak' apologize the lady of the house.

cant blame her. A housewife is a multitasking

carrier that requires one to possess agility,

fast thinking and a very loud voice.

'Boleh saya tau siapa cakap nii?'

'err, saya ni adik nya kepada cik farid,

kami dah lama tak kontek, sayer dapat

fon no ni pun selepas stalking FB cik farid

sekeluarga.. dia mungkin tak bagi tau kat

kakak pasal saya, dia sedih ngan keputusan

ayah 20 tahun lalu, terus dia merajuk lari,

tak per.. sayer nak bagi tau kater.. sayer ni

adik kepada farid,

nombor kad pengenalan dia xxx xx xxx,

dia ada parut kat bawah ketiak kena cucuk

ngan tunggul rambutan masa kecik, bla bla..'

and he spills all the other details only a dear

brother would know. Proof to convince the

person in the end of the other line that this

is the real thing. that this is not some

panggilan hangit, or any of those calls to

promote insurance policy.

Farid's wife just kept the conversation going

by nodding and making that noise when u nod..

'uhuh.. ahah, iyer ker? eh betul betul.'

'so sayer nak bagi tau kat kak, ayah sakit tenat,

macam dah nak unplug dah. tolong la mintak abang balik,

yang lepas tu sudah lah, kami just nak bagi ayah

boleh nampak abang one last time jer..

tolong lah balik..'

'ok ok, kakak bagitau yer.. '

the call ended with a hope.

A hope that the brother would

get the message . she sounded

symphatize enough.

surely she'd understand,

this is a dying man request

after an hour, ayah condition is getting stable,

although everyone knows it already its just a

matter of time. The Mother thought it is time

to call his eldest son again.

'laaa.. hang dok makan nasik lagi! pi talipon

abang hang nuh! kot dia dah balik dah kot

lepaih maghrib'

'uhukk uhukkk, hat ya baba,

uhuk.. nak telan sat!!'

truuuutttt..

truuuutttt..

'hallooo..'

'hello, boleh saya cakap dengan encik farid?'

'bapak nggak ada dirumah,

baruu bentar tadi bapak sekeluarga keluar.

'Keluar kemana tu mbak?'

ohh.. let it be he is coming home..

'katanya ke singapore, bercuti..'

'oh begitu ya mbak, tak apa lah, terimakasih ya'

Kesian ayah..

kesiaaan ayah...

Adalah cerita ego yang pocket ada.

Farid dlm citer ni bukan abang pocket,

tp abang kepada seseoang yg pocket kenal..

EGO patut padan yerr ..^^

426. EGO

Pocketeers,

Apa tu ego?

Pocket rase ramai yang tak tahu

maksud sebenar perkataan EGo,

sampai pernah dgr citer kater ada

anak ni dok bising nak balik umah

biarpun mak nyer halau...

pun dikatakan ego. silap koot :)

mari kita cuba pahamkan nya,

dan buat definasi sendiri :)

Pocket pun tak tahu sangat soo...

Definasi EGO bagi pocket,

Adalah keputusan yang bercanggah dengan

kehendak diri sendiri dijunjung biarpun

tindakan yang disusuli merugikan diri

sendiri.

Contoh mudah:

Pocket suka milo. (Kehendak)

Tapi pasal pocket pernah hina lelaki

semekin kater milo utk orang semekin jer,

(Tak baik tau hina hina orang.. adik adik

jangan buat!) orang kaya minum hot chocolate,

pocket tak minum milo lagi... (Keputusan)

Malah pocket maki sesapa yg minum milo

(Junjungan)

Biarpun sesekali pocket terpaksa curi curi

minum milo bawah tangga, sebab gian tapi

tak leh minum kat gerai, kang malu lah orang

tengok kan..(Tindakan yang makan diri sendiri)

buleh pakai tak?

Contoh kurang mudah:

Sebenarnya pocket suka kamu. (kehendak)

Tapi malu dengan kengkawan punya pasal,

pocket mengaku tak suka kamu. (keputusan)

Orang semua suruh ngaku jer, diorang tak kisah

puun, pocket jer yang amik pusing telebih.

Tapi sebab nak buktikan yg pocket

tak suka kan kamu, (Junjungan)

pocket gi dating ngan orang lain.

(Tindakan yg makan diri sendiri)

EGO ker nii?

ego lah kot.. kamu rasa?

Contoh cerita ego yang cukup pendek

nak dimuatkan dlm ruang komen?

Silakan pocketeers :)

425. ThenWhat?

...? ker pocket pung tak tahu,

Lepas Wordless Wednesday apo yer?

anyway.. ni abih spontan lah ni,

tak der spell check pun (Macam la selama ni ada pun)

pocketeers,

Online, buka blog..

check orang comment ngan senyuman menguntum,

reply memana yg patut n check bloglist.

buka bloglist dan bertandang ke blog yg disukai,

baca n komen ... (Baca okeh, jangan main scan for keyword jer n komen.. tak baik ^^)

then blog list pun dah check, komen pun sudah,

nak buat apa lagi?

post baru pun sudah, nak buat apa lagi?

BlogWalking?

camana tu? tengok kat kengkawan kita punyer komentator,

yg mana icon nyer comel sikit, kita click.

heheheh dah tu nak wat camana? nak baca komen orang?

baca post pun dah makan masa dah... ada masa pung sejam jer ni :(

then?

check komen sendiri kat blog yg previously kita komen?

then pocket rekomen, kalau ada ruang lg nak komen.

hummmm.. pas ni nak join pertandingan plak lah :)

nuffnang nyer pertandingan ker... kot kot dpt LCD tv heheheh

pocketeers sekalian camana?

424. Makan Berhidang Bertajuk

Pocketeers,

Previously i did write a post dat was describing

blogging like serving a dish on the table,

387. MakanBerhidang

here we go pocketeers, its the same ayam

masak merah all over again but with a different

question to it.

Pocketeers, when we serve our dishes, we do put

the sign up and high right? thanks to the

system of our dish serving, people can see the

dishes name in their bloglist. how we thank

technology for that right? now come the strategy

that was done by writer of metro,

the paper u bought early morning.

We write the title 'BIG'!!

Rendang Rozita CheWan

BigBall Bolognaise

Kueh Batang Cantik (Bukan batang buruk)

waaahhh.. people can really write the title

nicely kan :)

i however find it 'jahat' to write an exploding

title without the content that actually

explodes, like writing an artist name but

actually putting someone elses faces wearing

the same baju as the artist from some movie,

or ...

'bertandang ke rumah michelle yeoh'

but the content was just some picture of the

blogger posing infront of her house,

with the guard giving their fierce look.

'get away!! this is a private property!'

Now now i'm not saying anyone in particular,

but this is the only form of 'exploding' title

with a 'nuttin-much' content i could have think off...

(If i ever did hit someone, sorry bebanyak yer,

betul punyer pocket tak tahu sesapa yg wat gini

or bermaksud nak perli ker aper..)

but then again it doesnt have to be about the

rich and famous world only. A lot more 'exploding'

title that one can actually put,

with the 'nuttin-much' content.

like 'lucah' tajuk..

like sensitive title

and many more...

Now here was my attempt of being 'jahat' previously.

The title was not that much of an 'exploding-title'

but just a 'pop' sound like when u pull out the cork

from the wine bottle.

Pop!!

277. Pocket menjadi saksi : Ibu buang baby

227. K0ngkek!!

and apparently i could not find the third one that

made the same sound. Ohh..

i'd say its quite frustrating when i was lured

to a blog with a tittle about RealSteel movie review,

but it was actually filled with pictures of 5year old kids

hitting each other in the lawn with their cute faces.

Not that i actually found this, but this is the best

example i could think of.

hey hey, pocketeers who are very much better blogger

then i am, what do u think?

'Exploding' tajuk...

can we call it deceiving?

or is it just a matter of good writing?

423. TigaEkorGagak...

Pocketeers,

Pagi tadi pocket lambat sikit bangun,

nak kata macam biasa kang rakan rakan

sekalian akan kata pocket memang lelaki

yg tak leh diharap selalu bangun lambat

la plak so baik jer la pocket cakap kater

'in a rare occasion, i was late today..

blame it on my housemate who insisted

for me to join them watching Transformers3

all over again the night before'

Diam! pocket masih lagi berpendapat bahawa

sentinel ngan megatron adalah patriot dan

optimus adalah pembelot. read it more here :

355. HailMegatron..

Kembali kepada cerita pocket lambat.

Entah kenapa 12 lampu trafik sepanjang perjalanan

semua ijau! pocket tak perlu melajukan diri pung ari ni,

just bawak jer ngan kelajuan maximum which is 60km/j

dan masih sempat sampai ngan 2 minit untuk nak menari

depan scan machine tu :)

Aku sempaaaattt... Aku sempaaaatttt...

Gitu gitu,

Jadi terpikir lah lelaki ini, adakah lampu ijau ni

bermaksud sesuatu? ari ni nak dapat benda besh ker?

gaji masuk awal sikit hanya utk pocket yang kononnya

rajin berkerja ni?

Yes, pocket menanti sampai ke hujung hari dan satu satunya

benda yang berbeza sikit berlaku kat pocket ari ni adalah

si awek yg selama ni pocket ingat minat kan pocket,

dok call pocket happy happy, sedih pun ada...

kekadang tu dok sembang lama lama,

sebenarnya nak iklan kan product kurus. ohh!!

Orang zaman dulu kan, semuanya ada makna.

Burung balik kenyang tu tandanya dah nak maghrib,

buleh la buat khemah n start kan api tuu..

bewak melintas kat depan tu sial maksudnya,

sila lah baca sikit jampi serapah setakat mana yg ada.

n tengah dok masak, dok tak dok periuk porselin

kita tu buleh retak.. sila lah talipon anak yg ada kat skolah,

suruh tunggu, 'abah gi amik tau! abah gi amik!!'

mungkin juga faktor animinisma yang tebal dikalangan

orang tua kita, tapi diorang percaya, percaya sampai

yang kebetulan dikatakan kebenaran, yang tahyul jadi fakta,

yang tak der.. jadi ader!!

maa tak per lah, tu zaman tak leh tangkap gambar bertiga,

anyway...sebagai self motivation untuk kita

kita dizaman menanti kiamat ni, apa kata kita

percaya bebenda tahyul tu dari segi positif,

apo pun positif..

-tak leh nak kunci pintu pagar..

report ari ni mudah lah nii..

-ada gagak tiga ekor?

ari ni aku audit, buleh meratah supplier nii..

-tetengah jalan biasa nak ke tpt keja ada

dahan patah jatuh bebetul masa pocket nak lalu.

nak dapat wit claim ari tuu nii, cantik!!

tgh wit tak der nak raya camana kan?

-gatal tangan kanan, nak masuk wit nii,

-gatal tangan kiri, nak masuk wit gak nii,

moga ari ari kamu yang rasa tak besh tu

buleh diteruskan sampai ke petang,

jangan jatuh ditengah ari, kalau pocket yg jatuh,

orang tak angkat. orang golek jer..

pasal idup ni tak senang, tak senang sayang.

kuperlukan janji janji, biarpun fantasi,

biarpun tak sampai sampai setelah ku nanti,

hanya sekadar harapan yang terus mendegupkan jantung ni,

Ohh..

so ari ni 12 traffic light suma ijau beb!

traffic dlm blog pocket pun mencecah 120 unique ker haa?

humm hummmm.. (Baru 120 unique? hek enneeeee)

422. SapaMakanCili....

.Pocketeers,

its been a lot of rain lately,

during this rain, my motorcycle seems to be less and less

useful day by day. ohh.. kena beli keter lah gini.

anyway, bebaru ni pocket ada post pasal stalker, 414. Profail

dan sebagai gula dalam post pocket, gambar bebarang

yang pocket beli ditaruk untuk diprofail,

terimakasih untuk profile pocket,

seriously ada sesetengah nyer mengejutkan pocket

dengan ketepatan tekaan kamu :) yg mana satu?

nanti lah pocket bagitahu .

Jue dari 'Let The Blog Do The Talking, Aight!'

ada komen pasal makanan pedas. Come to think

of it kan, kita ni memang tak leh makan kalau tak der

elemen pedas kan. Cuba sebut, lauk apa yg kita makan

masa lunch yg tak pedas? ikan goreng kunyit?

teman dia tetap jgak sambal belashan :) pedas jgak tu.

Sayur toge? ader ker orang makan nasik ngan sayur

tu jer? plus! ada gak cili besar sekeping dua.. tak rasa! tak rasa!

If ever pocket dapat penyakit yg tak leh makan

langsung pedas... mahu kurus kering jadik nya nanti.

punya tak dak selera :)

(Eh! that is an idea!! mari kita jangan makan pedas

sampai new year. kot buleh ensem sikit, lagi gmort

makan KFC tetiap ari ado lah)

so introducing, teman dikala tiada sambal belachan,

teman nak ditabur atas maggi kari,

sila cari kat Tesco or Giant or Kafu... rasanya ada dijual

kat bahagian makanan bebotol, sekali ngan cendawan

dlm tin dan juga luncheon dalam tin.(Eh tak!! tak!! takk!!!)

Pedasnya ? pedas yang sedap, dulu pedas sikit,

sekarang ni pcket tak rasa pedas sangat dah, mungkin

lidah ni dah jadi lidah tebal dah kot. lidah bewok.

tp dulu masa memula diperkenalkan ngan product ni,

dok rasa pedas yang amat dah. sesapa yg jumpa product

ni, sila beli dan test. kalau kamu kata product ni pedas

yang amat, maka pocket dah sampai tahap dewa dalam

makanan pedas.. pas ni mari menuntut lagi ilmu ke tahap

yang lebih tinggi, super saiya level kakaroct! bezita jaga kamu!!

heheheh,

yes, i know.. post yang mudah lagi enteng,

pas ni nak taruk lagi persoalan persoalan serious,

so kita cuti lah dulu yer heheheh...

pocketeers!! happy cuti yer :)

makan maruku tu jangan banyak sangat ^^ dehydrated nanti

421. AyatAyat Lama

Ohh pocketeers,

it was a long and long storyline with the word

'bersambung' that was starting to annoy people kan :)

sorry, this is not the sinetron ^^

so to ease your mind off things in this

lovely weekend. here are some of the quote

engraved in my mind.

Definitely used it in my comment or my post,

just thought would be nice to share it again.

So that i wont forget.

1) Being in luv with a man

is like keeping a dog.

let him loose, let him run,

he'll come back by the end

of the day to sit by your porch.

loyal and happy, tail wiggling. :D

If u tie him down

or keep him in the

cage, he'll bite the

hand that feed.

he'll try to get

away..

and if he succeed.

he might never come back.

2) Being with someone is like owning the car,

the commitment the money involved.

Yes you will end up owning the best car fit for u.

but hear this, even if u were driving your car,

the cute MyVi or some savvy looking mini cooper :)

u still be looking at the BMW or Wira that

is parked by your side. just to look at that

nice circuit, bumper, spoiler, tinted, leather cover.

no no u'r not going to touch or test drive the BMW,

u're just looking at it in awe of its beauty.

no harm done kan?

(Found the actual post : Cars <- it was so long ago,

about 500post before!! waahh how time flies kan)

3) satu tahu, itu rahsia,

dua tahu, itu gossip,

tiga tahu, itu kabar angin,

empat tahu, itu pengetahuan am.

lima tahu, well u might as well as

announce it in the 8o'clock news.

so dont ever let your secret be known to

more then one person. and that one person is u.

okeh :)

happy weekend pocketeers, drink a lot of fluid,

dont forget the sayur. it'll be a heck of a next week

to swim our ass into :)

420. Final Grave Digging

Pocketeers,
Sambungan dari : 419. GraveDigger4
yang sambung dari : 418. GraveDigger3
yang sebelumnya tu: 417.GraveDigger2
yang bermula dari : 416. GraveDigger...


The itik and ayam talked till the time
come for the itik to prep for the next
customer. Farid signal the time by knocking
on his wrist a few time and she understood.
Both of them properly get dressed and leave
the room that holds their secret.

Farid gave her 500baht for her time.
It was his fault for not realizing.
SHe was the victim. Daily target not secured.
It seems like she's targetting 5-8 customer
pernight, Farid was her second.

They got out of the room and went to the
counter where Farid suppose to wait for the
boss. To his amazement, all the other boss
were already there waiting for him,
they start to teas him as he was the
latest one coming out of the room. 'Two time ka!!?'
The lady just smiled keeping the secret
all for herself.
Farid did explained to them saying that
nothing happened, that he thought it was
the actual body tweaking massage, that he
did nothing but just talked.
'yer lah yer lah, kami tahu, kami pun sembang
jer tadii heheh' was their reply in their
broken english laughing histerically in the end
ohh how uncomfortable the feeling was..
not only the uncomfortable vibe from the bosses reply
but also from his unwashed body with the foreign
sabun starting to itch here and there. They left
the place with Farid waving his hand at the scrambler
lady wishing never to see her again.


............................End..................................................

There u go pocketeers,
I know its hard to believe but that was the
story from someone whom i know quite well.
whom i knew his juvy record and cases with the ladies,
i trust him, and his last answer kinda make me trust
him even more. listen.

I did asked, 'at first u didnt realize that u were going
to that place, OK fine, so u were tricked to go there.
But now that u are already there, what kept u from
actually doing the dosa-besar?'

His reply was nice.
'Those junk mail people kept on distributing
that shows picture of Aids victim and
Sex transmitted Disease did make me fear her.'
'ooooooo' unnoticingly i opened my mouth in awe.

'Fear to god and kursus kahwin lah kot pocket'
was the answer that i wanted to clap my hand and
hold his hand up high like u'r announcing a winner
from a boxing match.
'waah farid.. u are really something' i said.
dont u agree with me too pocketeers?
A strong guy like him are very hard to find...
although i wish that i will never be tested
the way god tested him. i still envy him.
cause i dont think i can top that.
.
.
.
he kept his silence for a while, looking into nothingness
like trying to picture something in his head. and he said...
'and of course, the scrambler lady is very much the cause,
if it was someone who look like lisa surihani, it would be a
totally different story altogether pocket.'
'ooiihh!!'


baru jer puji .. tarik balikk!! tarik balikk!!^^

419. GraveDigger4

Pocketeers,...

Sambungan dari : 418. GraveDigger3

yang sebelum tu : 417. GraveDigger2

yang asalnya dari: 416. Gravedigger...

...quickly wearing it regardless of the sabun

was still not fully washed away from his skin.

'aaaah suddah!'

The scrambler lady is now in her bathrobe

sitting on the tilam, clueless. she thought

she could do her job and get the money like

always, its usually not this difficult.

Everyone who's stepping their filthy shoes

inside the front door is with the same

purpose. well apparently for Farid it is

different.

After farid got fully dressed, he sat on the

scrambler lady's side. explaining how stupid

he was for not realizing what he's getting

himself into. He suggested to the scrambler

lady that it is better for him to wait near

the counter instead but the lady stopped him,

begging him to wait a while more.

Seems like there was some kind of dignity

to be kept as no customer leave the room 15minute

after registration.

And so farid stayed.

To keep the attention off the lady who are still

very much sexy (Bathrobe remember?)

Farid was looking at the basket the lady brought in,

it was filled with lotion and 'protection kit'.

Farid picked up one lotion and ask in the most

simplest english 'who buy?'

'i buy' was her reply, the frustration was still

visible in her intonation, 'all i buy! 800 baht!'

'ok ok.. jangan la marah.. yer'

'and if u want drinks, i buy! this place rule u know!'

and the conversation continues with itik talking

to ayam in dogs language. ohh..

but farid understood,

that life is not easy.

not easy at all.

Scrambler lady use to be a petani, growing crops

and selling em in the market, It doesnt pay well

for her family so he came down to the city for

the promise of the 'good life' but life in the city

itself dries off her income from her day job till

there's too less of money to send to her son.

A friend introduced her to the 'night life'

All started with the innocent dirty dancing

inside the glass room. The whole thing escalated

so fast, the next thing she realizes was here she is

talking to farid in the room for 'massage'

She have to prepare all the material to please

her customer, she even have to pay to the massage

parlour just to stay there working.

she was early today, if she was late from her day job,

which was a shoe selling shop. she have to do 'this'

job outside. According to her, it is far harder

to get customer outside the parlour, as more customer

prefer the 'ladies' inside the parlour.

Their health was 'supposedly' more secured.

The itik and ayam talked till the time come for the itik

to prep for the next customer. That is if anyone would

prefer a lady with hands as big as a male biceps.

.......................Bersambung...........

418. GraveDigger3

Sambungan dari the second story here : 417. GraveDigger2

and the First one here : 416.GraveDigger...

Hearing her number called by Farid, the

lady quickly stood up and approaches him.

As any other thai lady would greet people,

she bow her head with her hands put together

saying something inaudible.

'This way sir' the lady told farid, 'Oh u know english?'

Farid asked. 'Little Little' showing finger sign

like trying to pinch a bit of salt while cooking.

Farid was led upstair to this room with the light

fairly lit. There was a tilam on a katil placed

in one corner of the little room right infront of

the door, a wet corner for taking showers

with only plastic drapes hanged to prevent the

water from drenching the carpet outside.

The lady guided Farid inside the room, showed

him where to place his baju, and signed him to

take a shower first before the massage session starts.

She left him for his privacy and Farid did what

he was told, he took off his stinking baju that

he wore from the morning and start to take his shower.

It was hot water and Farid was enjoying himself

applying the freshly unwrapped foreign sabun

that he found from the bath corner all over his

body.

He was kinda lost in his own shower,

enjoying the water came pouring on his

body all so nicely. It was after he started

to rub his face with the cheap sabun that

he felt fingers touching him from behind.

'oiihh!!' startled farid shouted and with his

face full with sabun, he turned around to see who

was the person celaka enough to touch him when

he is naked taking his bath. His left hand covering

the private part and his right hand was held upright

trying to push away whomever it was touching him.

With the poor visibility from the sabun, his hand

touched the person who came in disturbing him.

Oh no!! It was soft.

'Sorry Sorry' an apologizing voice did not eased

the tense. Even made Farid to panic away and quickly

took some water to clean the sabun from his face.

'apo nii!!' bantai cakap melayu trus.

As his eyes able to open properly, he saw the

scene he wish he never had the chance to see.

The scrambler lady all naked standing in front

of him putting her hands together apologizing.

kalau cute tak per gak,

'No! No! No need! No need!' he gestured

the lady to wear her bathrobe again.

and as she turned away to wear her bathrobe,

Farid 'mencapai' baju tidor yang tersangkut di dinding

and quickly wearing it regardless of the sabun

was still not fully washed away from his skin.

'aaaah suddah!'

Ohh farid... what were u expecting?

........................................Bersambung........

after the story finished,

I did asked Farid,

what were u thinking?

U honestly thought it was a standard

massage parlour that would bend

your hips and pull your back or something?

his answer was as honest and naive as he is,

'Yes!'

417. GraveDigger2

Pocketeers,

here i am trying to finish this story faster then the usual tempo.

Sambungan dari : 416.GraveDigger...

he just kept on saying ok and smile.

They walked their lazy perut off through

the alley of bankok until they reached the

massage parlour at the end of one dark road,

step inside and there was a counter with

an old lady behind it watching some tv show.

the front desk was full with vanilla scent and

some foreign ointment fragrance.

One of the bosses know how to talk in thai

requested the service for his friends.

4 japanese and one malay. After a few of

'cai mai kap, nong kap, mai dai mai dai'

in thai language which seems like price

negotiation. The boss asked him to pay up

300 baht. And so farid paid.

'ok ok farid, u pick first!' the boss instructed.

Farid being the naive guy he is, lead the group into

this room where about 15 to 20 girls sitting on

seats like u'r watching football in the stadium.

10 on the front row, the others at the back row.

All of the massuse puts their hand together and bow in a

very gentle manner. Farid being the guy who wanted

to get his leg bent and his spine step upon thought that

he should get the largest lady with muscular hand.

A lady that look like she came to work on a

scrambler motorcycle got his attention.

I actually dont know the proper name for that

motorcycle, the one charlie's angels ride in the

second sequel where Pink did her special appearance.

But in kampung, we call it as the 'motor-scrambler'

With a bit of jongang teeth up front,

long hair fit with her tall appearance.

her biseps was not as big as schwarnegger's,

but comparing to ladies on the same rows,

hers was the biggest.

'Oh this is my lucky day,

i get to choose the best massuse'

he thought. 'Number 47!' he ended

the other's misery by choosing his massuse.

As soon as he declared his number, the bosses

went on and shout out their choice of numbers.

'24!'

'9!'

'17!' like kids telling their father their choice of

icecream for the day. aa nak itu! nak itu!!

'22 and 13!' ohh!! what is this with two massuse!?

oh let him be, he got money. one to massage his leg,

while another to massage his head maybe.

Farid was happy enough with

his choice. The best one there is.

Scrambler Lady.

........................................Bersambung..................

Adeh la fariiidd... adehlaa...

choose pocketeers choose but choose base on the requirement.

u wanna ride bicycle in the highway, choose the best one there is.

dont buy the dirt bike okeh... that is for the 'Off Road' :D

Adeh la fariiidd... adehlaa... tak dapek den nak nolong

416. Grave Digger...

Pocketeers,

People have stories, some are told daily,

some they have to take to their grave. <-this is the only connection with the tajuk okeh!

Stories like :

-I was the one who change the ubat

that resulted the patient next to me died,

-My friend's second baby was actually mine.

-I still love u.

But some story are high level security

that is often told to your dearest friend only.

-That guy did it once with a lady from abroad.

-That lady fancy ladies.

-Her recent picture struck a left hook punch to

my cheek that sent me pening lalat all over her

again.

This story i'm about to tell u is a top level

security story, a story Farid will never tell

his wife, nor will he ever brag with his family,

but he told me.... and i?

will always tell good story to u pocketeers,

keeping the details of who he is locked deep

down my pancreas.

Once Farid went to thailand with

his boss, all four of them from the

country that often dub as the

'negara matahari tubik'

(mana datang pelat kelantan plak nii?)

They did their work that ended with

a very delicious dinner that consist

of food Farid never thought of eating.

Sea Urchins sushi with Tuna Sashimi.

waaahhh..

I am envying his story as he was telling em.

After the dinner, it seems like the boss

wanted to get some massage nearby.

And farid being Farid who never suspected

anything out of the ordinary thought...

'Hey! I kinda need some massage myself,

as it was a long day and the muscle is aching.

This is thailand anyway.. they're famous for

their thailand style massage, so why not?'

and so he agreed to go with the

bosses to the massage parlour.

According to Farid, the bosses kept on

talking in their language and repeatedly

asking him. 'u massage ok? ok?' with hand gesture

of massaging someone's shoulder.

He notices them making their weird faces,

as if shocked that he too are 'OK' with

massages. Why not? since when massage is

a forbidden thing to do by any nation?

he just kept on saying ok and smile.

........................................Bersambung..........................

for those who know where is this story going,

lets keep it under the lid okeh :D maybe some

others are still wondering, how is farid's fate

after this.

some people are not exposed,

they are best in the way they are.

u over there!!

have u ever wished that u were

never exposed to the 'dark'

side of the day?

let this heart be as clean

as it should be?

well i do, oh let there be sunshine

^^;

415. Percanggahan

Pocketeers,

sila lihat dan baca,
pocket tak paham..
yg omputeh nyer kater :

Free Gift While Stock Last.

kiranya menarik perhatian lah jugak kan,

ada adiah siot! kalau nasib kita baik..

maybe buleh dapat Free Gift tersebut.

Yang Bahasa Melayunya plak :

Harap Maaf Hadiah Percuma Kehabisan Stok.

eh? ni direct translation ker?

pun tak jgak...

translation nyer bercanggah benar

ngan tulisan omputeh nyer!

ohh..

nak suruh beli ker tak nii? adehlaaaa...

cubaaa la buat betul betul sikit...

Jumpa kertas ni kat

TESCO BUKIT MERTAJAM.

414. Profail

Pocketeers,

Stalkers need to do dirty work too sometime,

they steal your 'sampah' that u carefully wrapped

in that black plastic bag and start to analyse.

(U'r placing it at the back of the house not guarded anyway)

'oh what can they ever find pocket?' u may ask..

oh a lot i'd say.. alot!

buying stuff and where do u put the receipt pocketeers?

in the dustbin? then the stalker would know that u've

went to see movies at 1145 today, what title, how many person.

How do they use the info?

Well after half a year of stalking,

if they sees pattern... they can always lurks at the back of the tiang

where u usually goes to watch your wayang and jump on you.

scarry huh?

KFCs carton box,

Pizza Hut,

will definitely mean something,

of course, dont let me start on the personal stuff,

Hell they can even know the 'Date'!!

or ladies nowaday dont care much about the 'date' anymore?

the comercial is up and running like no one else care (How else kan?)

so!! lets play a game pocketeers,

here is a picture of my groceries today.

i looked at this and i kinda able to summarize

the owner of this groceries in three words.

care to profile the owner too pocketeers?

i'd say the owner of this is :

health cautious

sweet tooth.

mid of the month. (Tak jugaakkk)

kan!?

413. ThatWasThen...

...HowIsNow?

'hello, nama saya pocket, saya nak tanya pasal rumah
kat inderawasih tu, yang namber ni ada kertas iklan tu,
ada kekosongan lagi tak untuk saya masuk menyewa?'
'ada! mai tengok besok okeh, nanti kita kira macam mana ya'
a young and vibrant voice replied, seems like she was laughing
about something when i called her.there was a crowd behind.

The next day i went and stand infront of that two storeys
house with filantera.We were allowed to enter the gate by
this small cute lady who introduced herself as Ima after
20minutes of giving salam. She look somewhat like that
lady nurse in hantu bonceng, small and petite with hair
to the chest, i think there was a short underneath that
big t shirt, nice legs.
She must be into modelling .......yang tak cukup inci.
(amboi mengata kat oraaanng!!)

We entered the house and she started to explain
about things in the house.
This key is stuck,
that sink is broken,
someone did it there..
and somehow the way everything was going on,
it was like i have said 'yes' to the room and the payment.
She just kept on telling me about how hard it is to get
a good penyewa.

'So ini bilik nya, tingkap tu tak der la kan,
sebab asalnya pun memang bilik utk orang gaji nii,
dekat ngan dapur. Best part is u got the toilet all
for yourself!' and then she continued to tell me all
the other rules in the house,
the toilet must not be locked during the day cause
someone is renting the ruang tamu as a tuition class,
the room must be kept tidy,
the hot water is for every one in the house,
the back side of the house is kinda dangerous,
the second floor was off limit.
'eh, kenapa saya tak leh naik second floor kak?'
'bukan tak leh, tp kena inform kami dulu lah kan,
kang kami dok bogel ker aper, daaah ilang rezeki
pocket seminggu' Ima replied half jokingly.
'acaner tu?' Frankly speaking, i dont mind sis :D
'iyer la sayer dok master bedroom, ada dua lagi
housemate kita dok kat bilik lagi dua tu,
kakak jepun ni keja cikgu. muda lagi.. dalam 28 kot,
sorang lg RHB bank nyer exec. Pompuan jugak,
so macam pompuan second level, lelaki ground level gitu'

'oh yaa kaaaa? ok...' with an unimpressed face i replied,
but deep down i was as happy as a boy who got his first kiss.
the quadricep was twitching to leap. tahan! tahaan! tahaaaan!!

'okeh lah, kalau gitu besok saya bawak
barang barang saya masuk lah yer kak..'
'eh, ni dok berkakak kakak ni umur dia
lagi tua lagi nih, kita baru 24.. lah'
'oh ya kah? sorry yer ... Ima' with a smile in the end.
tahaaannn!! tahaaaaannnn! jangan lompat lagi!!!

We left the place with a smile in our face
just to stop the car nearby to leap three four times
by the side of the road letting out the happiness.
Hoyeah!
i'm gonna see some action!
i'm gonna see some action!
with melody just like little girl singing
'yeaa yeaaa! nak gi mandi kolam! yeaa yeaa!'
heheheh


end of my karangan gatal.
as much as i was happy then,
i am worried now.
This story was back in 2004,
I wonder how is now?
how will the future be?
our next generation?
My grand daughter calling me
with boys shrieking sound as
they're doing pranks to other
boys at the back.
'oh they're just my housemate atuk'

Tell me pocketeers, how is ...'NOW'?

412. RealSteel

...was kinda light..

pocketeers, today i went to see the movie 'real steel'

yes i know, its the mid of the month and i'm spending

my money on movies? what can i say,

i have a soft spot for sports movie.

Hugh jackman is old enough to play the role of a

useless father to an eleven years old now,

or was it nine? maybe ten?

but he didnt do anything that much fatherly though,

he was a 'pal' through out the whole movie.

mudah nyer kamu dapat wit :D

This is a good movie to watch as it was light,

the actors dont have to act that much.

no one cried like someone died...

the best facial expression hugh jackman did

was staring the kid when he have to return

him as part of the deal.

well... enough about the acting, i cant say much,

i am the guy who thought 'I Am Sam' movie

was actually played by an actual down syndrom guy.

It was light as the movie was about boxing,

and not like other sports movie,

boxing is an easy sport to understand.

the bell means stop.

no pukul 'bawah' sana

no kaki,

tumbuk bagi kena,

elak la.. jangan dok tengok saja :D

(Its not like baseball or the rugby u know)

But even though this was a light movie,

the predictable storyline did made me cry for

2 straight minute.

Saw it coming but i still got hit by it.

I was holding my breath to make sure the lady

on the side did not see my body shaking.

'uhuk! uhuk!' ooiihh malu lah...

as i saw the rain came pouring on both of my side,

I let go.

Huwaaaaa!!! nasib baik tak banjir!! hahahah

meluat lah! pondan kan.. i know...

lets blame it on my father shall we :D

anyhow, i like it, no! i think i luved it,

if the DVDs is out, i'll be buying it and frame it

so that my housemate cant scratched it dat much.

maybe i'll buy two.. one for back up another to watch

over and over again.

Nak tangan cam abang hugh jgak buleh tak?

The moral from the movie was however... too light,

'If u left your son for 11 years, one summer

of family bonding is enough to make it up again.'

as if kan...

as if...

Hey hey! watch the movie will ya,

and tell me what do u think about boxing :D

411. BajuTradisi

Pocketeers, i am still in shah alam,

had too much of blue cheese this morning,

having a bit of a wars between dragons inside

my tummy now. :( toolooong,

Baju kebangsaan vietnam : Ao dai katanya nama.

sila klik kat nama baju tu untuk ke wikipedia.

Pocket raser, baju ni cantik dlm nakal.

Kata neshenel jiografik, bukaan kat pinggang

tu memang traditionally designed like dat.

manusia memang gitu kan,

dah ada adat adat lagi istiadat,

kalau nak nakal tu, dia nakal jgak.

sama la cam kita kita ni pun.

Baju melayu lelaki, kemas berbutang bersongkok,

bersampin ketat ketat, tuck in kasi nampak

ponggong pyung pyung :D

(Tak der kena mengena langsung pocketeers, sila abaikan ^^)

well u know what i mean,

Pocketeers! am missing the time i'm lazily

posting my slow moving story on my desk

back home with milo sejag on the side.

oh rindu.. pergi la jauh jauh :D

410. PapaRodhi..

...buat la keja bebetul sikit ooooiiiii,

bukan badan nyer yg kita nak tengok.

muka nya laah!! muka nyaaa!!

A short post for pocket yang sedang diperantauan ^^

missing my quiet life in my house with my fish and my housemates.

The DVD's and the milo jag besar..

nak baliiiikkkkk!!!

409. Kebelakangan ni "dapat" tak?

'Farid..' ngan suara tenang nyer kak Azie bertanya,

'..ni apasal yang marah marah nii, semalam tak "dapat" ker?'

dengan suara sinis dia abis kan ayat dia...

oih oih!! kot yer pun nak ber 'bantering'

cuba lah jangan dihadapan kanak kanak bawah umur.

daaah jadi pengaruh tak baik kat diorang ^^

Tapi pocket dapat!!

and yes memang la Shazwan CD dapat dulu,

Tapi pocket dapat jgak!!

kiranya pocket pung sama ensem ngan pilot lah kot!

(Tak dak kena mengena langsung kan.. apoooolah)

Dapat? Dapat dari siapa?

pocket dapat dari cik Dhiya Fariza!!

nindiaaaaaa...... Wit Raya! :D (Korang ingat apa!?)

actually ini adalah hadiah untuk kontes yang cik DhiyaFariza

buat kepada pembaca pembacanya yang selalu dok pergi

membaca celotehan dia, pocket bernasib baik untuk

memenangi kontes tu, lantas dapat la wit raya yang besh

tak terkira nih, yes mungkin bagi kamu yang tahu nilai wit

ni kater, alah lima hinggit jer pon..

tp bg pocket yg tak penah gi pun myanmar tu,

dpt wit arab kalu abih besh lah :D

wit ini datang jugak dengan kad raya ikhlas dari ati.

penuh ngan tulisan tangan yang cun melecun,

untuk seorang doktor yang bakal menggagalkan

cobaan penipuan MC nanti, kamu menulis dengan

cantiknya :D

so pocketeers,

minggu ni adalah minggu

yang happy bagi pocket. :D

Kerana pocket juga .....

.

.

.

... 'dapat' tadi :D

408. Syik! Asyik! Asyik!...

...asyik asyik nya berchintaaaaa....
Asyik = Obsessed

Pocketeers,
have u ever met anyone who's so obsessed
with something that talking to him/her
would be difficult and frustrating,
u cant ask anything to these type of people
without him turning the flow of the
conversation to the thing he is obsessed about.

'sihat?'
'aku sihat la, tapi cik annuar kita nuu
tak sihat sihat jugak, haii bila la orang
kat malaysia ni nak perasan yang kita ada
PiEm yang korap dan terlibat dalam dosa dosa besar'
'oh, sihat la .. okeh, saya balik dulu yer!'

was his reply after just a simple
question about his health. Stupid no?

Its like he want people to change into
his way of thinking, and anyone who is not,
is loss in this world without guidance
to meet the creator. left miskin with rags
to cover from the coldness of winter,
titi to block rain and untreated river
water to wash the rag u slept with.

Pocketeers,
U know how we men are always competetive
in making money, that is why we dress u
the way we do, as a trophy for us to brag about.
Those shiny metal we bought u, show em off..
the more u show em, the better we look.
As the best Money Making Machine :D
But some are so obsessed in them that they
want everyone to make money like all those
meliyana do, or at least think the way
they want you to.

'oh u buat akuarium?'
'ader la 2 kaki nyer marine'
'u ni bodoh tau, buat aper taruk hiasan
yang menyedut duit kat living room tu?
baik u buat bisnes, u pandai pasal ikan,
aper kater u bela ikan hiasan utk dijual?'
'eh, i .. aaa.. macam tengah study lagi nii.'

Nah kena sebijik jadi bodoh. but mind u if u
ask him what are they doing?'adaaa lah sikit sikit'
after a few digging, u found out that he's one
of those who did forex and lost a few thousand in
that and now in the depth of debt. Hek Enneeee..

talking to people who are obsessed is no fun.
sometime i would call them stupid, stupid for
looking stupid infront of people,
bragging like he knows the politic better,
looking down on people like i'm not making money enough
preaching like i'm a mualaf, (I do look like a mualaf though^^)
questioning my action like i'm a stupid boy
who bought the wrong house.
stupid kan...

and i know, they think i'm stupid too.
stupid for not knowing who muhyidin yasin is,
stupid for spending so much in an aquarium
when i still have debt to pay,
stupid for... well i'm a bit malu already. shutting up.

oh obsessed people, who need u guys anyway.
i'll call u when i need advice ok :D

407. Kalau CInta Itu Wujud...

...beginikah perasaan nya?

..bila kita bercadang cadang nak keluar

makan ngan gadis itu, tapi dok terasa

tak padan membuang masa disitu berbanding

dengan bersembang dengan sigadis ini.

banding ngan tengok cerita armageddon

yang dah 15 kali tengok dengan gadis ini.

banding ngan a simple phone call dengan

gadis ini.

..bila kita keluar negeri dan terbayangkan

muka gadis ini bila nampak katak hiasan.

'dia mesti menjerit kalau aku bagi benda ni :D'

sambil tersenyum sorang sorang depan sales girl.

..bila kita u turn, drive 24 kilometer,

beli barang yang dipesan tapi terlupa tadi...

hanya untuk sangkut barang tu kat pintu pagar

rumah sigadis ini.

dan mendapat a simple two letter sms that says 'TQ'

..bila kita rasa benci dengan sigadis itu,

yang gadis ini dok marahkan sangat,

hanya kerana gadis itu pecahkan tupperware gadis ini.

(Although the story did sound like it was an accident)

..bila kita rasa tak keruan,

tak leh dok diam, gelisah, tanpa sebab.

tapi perasaan tu hilang kalau ternampak

bumbung rumah sigadis ini, rindu ker ni?

kalau la cinta tu wujud,

beginikah perasaan nya cinta?

atau selama ni pun hanya

physical attraction between different sexes?

406. 3 KuehChara

Macam biasa, tajuk pocket tak pernah nya

kena pun dengan story pocket,

heheh, but i like it.

Pocketeers,

Pocket pernah dengar, macam sabda rasul ker,

sahabat ker yang mendengar rasul bersabda.

mengatakan bahawa ada tiga cara nak mengenali

seseorang sahabat tu.

Cara pertama : Bermusafir dengan dia

Cara Kedua : bermuamalah dengan dia

cara ketiga : bermalam dengan dia.

Mulanya pocket tak paham,

apa la kena mengena semua ni ngan nak kenal

orang tu kan.. hatibudi manusia tu buleh reveal

ngan tiga cara ni kah?

Bebaru ni ada la orang xplain kat pocket,

baaarulah nak paham.

katanya kalau kita bermusafir ngan seseorang kawan

ni baru la kita buleh tau hati budi sebenar dia

dari segi sabar ke tak dia dengan pemandu teksi

yang dok menggatal, dengan orang ramai yang dok

langgar sana sini beg berat dia,

ngan bas yang janji kol 11 mlm, kul 1 baru sampai...

yes, ngan bermusafir or jalan jalan ngan dia,

memang kita buleh mengenal kesabaran dia.

'Lapaq ayaq la weih!! moh le minum jaaap'

kalau kita bermuamalah ngan dia,

baru la kita buleh tahu dia tu

lokek nyer orang ker tak?

dia berkira sampai nam kupang pun

nak tuntut balik ker tak.

or 'lebih kurang halal yer?' :)

berubah ker tak sikap dia bila berlaku

perselisihan paham pasal wit.

trus jadi along and ikat pocket dalam

toilet ngan kasi makan roti jer ker kamu?

amik oil base paint dan simbah kat motor pocket kah kamu?

yang paling besh, bermalam ngan dia,

pasal manusia buleh berpura pura masa siang jer,

bila malam, masa nak tido, abih bersih diri tu,

kalau pun buleh bertahan ngan topeng tu, l

agi tiga malam, nampak la kebenaran tu timbul

macam ikan mati mengotori permukaan air yang

indah lagi tenang.

yang bergigi palsu kena cabut,

yang berdengkur akan berbunyi,

yang mengigau? akan sebut nama tersayang

bantal bucuk pun akan menonjolkan diri.

yang isap jari? i ok jer.. :D

so cam gitu lah tiga jalan nak mengenali sahabat kita,

pocket nak sangat mengenali kamu kamu dan kamu dengan

lebiiih lagi.

so! sesapa nak gi terengganu ngan pocket tak!?

pat hari tiga malam (bermalam)

pocket belanja :D (Bermuamalah)

datang penang n kita gi skali(bermusafir)

hoyeah! peluang ini terbuka utk pompuan jer :D

(Sila ignore... ini panggilan untuk pocket cari penyakit)...

405. KalaMalam BulanPurnama

Pocketeers,

kala..

Colour?? kaler? kala?

Scorpion kala apa?

hijau? merah? biru? itam?

.

.

.

.

kala jengking! <-hek enneeeee...

anyway, masa muda dulu korang pernah kena

hapal jadual berkala tu tak? punya la bosan kan,

i heard that for chemist, they have to remember

the whole jadual.. plus the nilai nilai plus minusnya.. ohh..

nak hapal the first 20 pung dah pocket nak giveup dah.

camana korang hapal yer dulu?

pocket?

adalah dengan perkataan panjang yang pocket simply hapal tanpa makna...

HiLiNak,BeMagCa,BAl Casinipo Os Fekal hey nenek arinal.

yang lawak nya tu pasal 'Arinal' adalah nama lelaki

yang memang kawan pocket, budak cube sebelah masa

kat MRSM dulu, kononnya seorang lelaki yg 160cm

tp berjaya melandingkan tapak kakinya kat pipi junior

yg 172cm masa sparring exercise in a taekwondo session..

orang cerita, pocket tak tengok.

apalah sangat 12 cm kata kamu?

cuba sendiri try tengok!

kembali kepada kala jengking,

eh tak!!

kembali kepada jadual berkala...

HiLiNak,BeMagCa,BAl Casinipo Os Fekal hey nenek arinal.

dikira menurun setiap perkataan,

seperti Hey Nenek Arinal tu adalah untuk Helium Neon Argon.

BeMagCa tu adalah untuk Berilium, Magnesium Calsium.

u got it right?

camana kamu hapal dulu pocketeers?

mesti keluar abih yang lucah lucah kan :D

heheheh^^;

404. Mencapai Bintang

Pocketeers,
yet another story that dont have anything to do with the title.
yes i know.. its inapropriate. and its dang filthy,
but atleast i'm not putting some artist name luring u guys
to read my post but the story got nothing to do about the STAR.
'Que behind vanessa hudgens at Universal studio singapore. hoyeah baby!'
It was the 70s, i was in my standard 6.
Its another 4 month to UPSR and the teacher was handing out
our Karangan Bahasa Melayu result paper. Back then we dont have
anything like a report card, just a simple A or B as a mark of

evaluation on the top right of our karangan paper.

Of course, our pencil handwriting will be beautifully decorated

with red pen correcting our spelling, noktah, coma, subject

and predicate.

'Normah! C ' screaming..'Salam! D' laughing,
'sumathy! A' mentioning our grades infront of the whole class,
I knew it already that mine will be the last one as usually i am
the one with the worst result. my karangan usually wrote so badly
that the teacher usually would personally say' teruk sangat nii!!
kena baca buku melayu sikit nih' as if i'm reading english book
that much.

'ok macam biasa saya akan bacakan ayat dari karangan-contoh
untuk hari ni, saya pilih ayat ini kerana saya suka dengan perkataan
yang digunakan untuk menonjolkan lagi situasi yang dihadapi.'
And she stop to flick her papers.
'tumin berlari kearah pintu' half screaming
'dia terus membuka pintu sambil mencapai kasut sekolah nya
yang berada di atas rak dan berlari dengan kaki ayam kearah
perhentian bas, bas nombor 2 sedang berhenti di lampu merah,
bas seterusnya adalah 30 minit nanti. tumin harus menaiki bas ini,
atau dia akan lambat ke sekolah'
'eh macam kenal jer ngan nama tumin tu?' i tot,
'karangan ini dari Pocket yang tetap mendapat C kerana kesalahan
tatabahasanya, tapi saya suka dengan cara penggunaan perkataan
yang dipilih.. Mencapai! berkaki ayam!' and she explained that it was
better to use 'mencapai' rather then 'mengambil' or 'memakai kasut'
as the word shows urgency.


oh i cant even describe u guys how proud i was that day,
me being refered to in my karangan darjah nam?
what a great experience. Sampai sekarang dok ingat woo.
heheh, i bet for u guys its not that much,
but for me it was heaven :D
depan awek tu yg besh tuu:D

just another piece of memory in this
small thumbdrive stuck inwards from
my left ear.
till next time pocketeers :D

Pocketeers, sila buat ayat dari perkataan 'Mencapai' ^^

403. What Does MC Stands For?

Medical Leave kalu bukan ML ker?

Today is monday, i should be posting about 3 posts

from friday,saturday and sunday. but i didnt.

well i was busy the whole weekend,

Went back to kampung so the net is not available.

That is one reason.

Friday was suppose to be a working day,

but i didnt go to work, MC...

the reason was diarhea. i hate to admit it,

but i did had diarhea, 'menipu' about this would

make me look cool, oh the not-so-discipline pocket.

But i cant. i ate something out of the ordinary i guess,

the result was me sleeping on the cold floor just

outside of the toilet. Cant sleep the whole night.

Waiting for the nature's call.

Here is a few tips for those who would

like to get MC even on your healthiest day.

1) Doctor cant verify diarhea, they just cant.

a doctor told a friend of mine this,

so doctors out there... please clarify.

so if u claimed u had diarhea,

the doctor just have to take your word for it

and grant u Medical Leave. Nice to know kan?

One more tips was to drink coca cola right before

entering the clinic, is this true people?

2) Take a piece of the regular cigarette

those stupid people smoke to ruin their lung.

Cut off the tip of the tembakau side (Not the filter side)

about 3mm, let it fall into sufficient ammout of water

to have a light yellow tea.

How light? well u have to do your own

experiment okeh, i wont know :D

The one i did was as light as my urine.

Filthy way of comparison kan.. heheh sorry :D

Once u got your light yellow tea of tembakau,

take the water with your hand and put it in your eyes.

For a few seconds u'll have to bear the pain

and what u get will be.... Conjunctivitis.

2 days of MC tu woi!!

heheheh:)

but just remember one thing,

the thicker the tea is,

the more painful it will be.

Dont go blind and tell the nurse,

'Pocket yang suruh wat gini!! huwaaa!!!'... heheh

Getting leave when u'r suppose to attend school/office

is fun... its not much fun about having to wake up late

and going to places u've never had the chance to go to.

Its more about the naughty feeling of getting away with

something mischievous.

just like what i've just commented in Saiazuan's post : Aku Suka Sex

its about doing something forbidden and feels good

about yourself who dont follow the rules.

(The same excuse goes to people who 'selingkuh')

happy taking Medical Leave's pocketeers, just dont go blind okeh :D