580. Ular!!!

Pocketeers,
Satu hari jumaat yang indah, pocket tengah keja,
pukul 530 petang dok tak dok, Mr Big suruh
buat translation report yang urgent diperlukan
pagi sabtu. POcket tengok report tu,
eleh.. selamba rock jer ni pocket buleh translate.
'Tak per MrBig!! malam ni saya hantaq!!'
dengan menunjukkan jari kebawah macam suruh
dia tengok seluar murah yang ku beli RM15.

So kul 6petang tu pocket start la translate,
ada 21 page powerpoint,
4 page utk tajuk (Senang)
12page utk graph (Medium)
5 page utk karangan (Susah)
siap janji lagi ngan housemate,
paling lambat pun kul 10 buleh
sampai la rumah ni. Belagak belagak..
kul 7 pulun lagi,
kul 8 pulun lagi,
kul 9 eh tak siap lagi...?
kul 10?
sekali translation tu tak siap siap
sampai kul 4 pagi!! pergh!!
masa keluar kilang tu dah start fening fening.
jalan ada sikit hoyong hayang. Tapi kita control.

Macam macam jadi masa kita ngantut ni,
yang paling ditakuti ialah otak auto-shut-down.
Kalau tengah dalam toilet or dah sampai umah ok lah,
kalau tengah naik motor, melintas jalan or juggling pisau?
wow!!
(Kenapa ko nak juggling pisau plak pukul 4 pagiii!!! adehlaaa)

Pocket buleh rasakan, symptom symptom otak dah penat,
antaranya dah tak leh bajet kekuatan sendiri,
pulas kunchi motor tu rasa cam buleh pusing lagi jer,
tapi dah max dah. Sikit lagi sure kunci tu patah.
dan yang paling besh is, the hallucination
pergh!! memang nampak macham macham siot!!

kat sini pocket terpikir...
apa kata kita absorb semua halusinasi ni,
kita terima jer jangan tahan.
macam kita lepaskan kentut, jangan tahan.
macam kita muntahkan jer isi perut, jangan tahan.
macam kita nangis jer bila tengok hindustan, jangan tahan.

and so that was what I did.
I absorb. It took some time, but somehow I managed.
pergh!! bebenda pelik buleh nampak woo!!
nampak orang tunggu bas,
sapa nak tunggu bas kul 4 pagi beb?
nak kata berteduh dalam ujan pun tak,
homeless tido? adik free hair baju kurung biru muda lagi!

Dengan kelajuan 50km/j,
dok blues tengok kereta yang jarang jarang lalu,
dok tak dok pocket brek menchakar!!
(hahahah orang kedah punya ayat ni, 'brek menyakaq!')
pocket nampak ada ular dok menjalar atas jalan,
itam lagi besor nyer ulor tu!! kalau langgar sure
kena patuk punyer lah!! kalau dia patuk motor tak pa
la kan, kalau dia patuk patela ku camana?
(Patela = kepala lutut)
lepas pocket stop, baru la nampak makhluk sebenar.
bayang bayang bendera ditiup angin dengan sumber
cahaya nya dari atas lah!!

Lebih kurang macam ni lah!! cuma melintang jalan... pergh!!!

Patung di kuil hindu berhampiran bagaikan menoleh
kan kepalanya kepada pocket.

Jauh didalam hutan kelapa sawit, ku lihat lembaga
bagaikan anney bersarong puteh terbang dalam
hutan menjual kachang.
Pocket rentikan motor, tengok!
oohhh.. kain banner iklan dipinggir utan rupanyaa.

Pocket sampai rumah alhamdulillah,
n went to be with a smile in my face,
how I enjoyed my journey home.
hence here I am telling the experience to you.

It was nice,
it was interesting,
a must try.
just let go..
let go of the truth,
let go of reality,
sometime u gotta let go..
and see the world from another point of view.
just let go :D
Tapi kalau berlebih tu akan membahayakan :D
pasal kalau ketagih ngan halusinasi ni lah yang
mula nak cari ganja or other prohibited meds

patutla orang yg tengah high nampak happy jer ^^;

heheheh

322. Firwan the Wanderer

Pocketeers,
in my stories i often use names as actual person name.
they're merely character just to make my story more lively.

Farid: a common name for a man, any man..
Ima : a common name for a lady, any lady...
Pocket : well the writer of course...
Mr G : pocket's direct supervisor...
Mr Big: pocket's big boss...

so today i'm going to introduce u to another character.
hopefully he will be just as interesting as others.

His name is firwan. Now now..
u know that this name is not even existed right?
i just made it up.. his real name is short and less
fancy name.. a more malay name, like dollah, samad or ali.

So Firwan is a guy who wanders alot. he think too much.
i dont think he took science or mathematics in his SPM
because he is more to sastera... the guy who are good with words.
he doesnt speak like all of us, u know...
when i wanna say 'your idea most likely is not appropriate wit the girls'
i'll say it like this 'idea hang tak sesuai ngan depa kooot'
but Firwan will say it like this ...
'aku rasa cadangan hang tu berkemungkinan besar
tidak selari dengan pandangan para gadis sekalian'

long and winding with imbuhan here and there,
sound like your Bahasa Melayu teacher spoke
when he's trying to make a point.

Cutting the story short ...
today Firwan made a sound...
'Gadis tu bagaikan hiasan utama siTuan rumah,
Membelinya senang, menjaganya yang susah,
dan akhirnya terabai dan berhabuk, jatuh dan pecah,
untuk diganti baru siTuan Rumah...'

oi oi!! bukan senang nak ganti baru ooiii...
nak melepaskan 'hiasan' tu banyak procedure woooo!!

happy holiday everyone...
i'm stuck at cleaning :(

23. MrBig

Mr Big,
Now let me tell u something bout MrBig, He's a very good man i would say.
Why? cause he's very sharp in managing our dept. when we talked, he'll gave
me quite a few double meaning question.
Like a question asked.. the answer will give 'makna tersirat'
and he kept on asking me question like that. I have to think even when he
ask what flavour of drinks i like to have if i go to Mamak Place.
'Are u married Pocket?' he asked once.
'aaa.. not yet.. am planning to but my time just not yet...' DaPocket answered
thinking its a template question just to break the ice.
'now i dont like my staff not being married yet. You bachelor dont have anything
to motivate u guys to work better. U'll end up jumping here and there just
to get more money or u'll end up coming to work just for the sake of coming to work...
not to improve the company,
not to improve yourself,
not to improve your family'
He said with full feeling like he believe in it.
(Well actually anyone would leave a company if one got better offer, the family will have to follow)
Another quality that he have would be his effort on making others shine.
Its like...'his crew shine... he'll shine better'
in order for the crew to shine... he wants everyone on the deck to work
and be acknowledge by the work done.
Some department captain out there doesnt do this.

He prefer his crew to be known to the whole armada as a good and handsome crew.
He once mad at us for not wearing leather shoes to work. Now that is obviously off
his boundaries right... but he thinks otherwise.
He personally brings up the issue of company uniforms being wrinkled to us.
he wanted us to look nice and presentable.
and the ringtones... remember previous post...
hahaha..

Now this is a sample of a good captain. if i ever become a captain. i'll try to do it
as he has done it when i'm under his wing.

Me EX5 rosak ari ni.. entah apasal ntah tak leh nak pergi
lebih laju dari 55 km/j. so terpaksa la pocket meredah
highway yang hujan tadi (Gurun - Sg2 Penang) dengan
kelajuan 50 km/j. theory nyer... 70km ngan 50km/j...
then i'd be taking 1hr24min.
Wrong... somehow i spent 2hrs on the EX5 today.
sakit ponggong!!

22. MrBigMe'naga'

Pocket...
dat day was quite a cursed day i would say.
the day started hot from the morning turns to hell
when the production line found a piece of part which
have an obvious defect on it.
A part of plastic was missing from the part.
How does the incoming do their inspection when this
kind of defect is also undetectable?
To make it worse, the affected percentage was
dang high... 80% NG Part mixed with OK Parts.
To make it hell, the affected parts is assembled and
sent to Oversea.

We are summon to 'mengadap' Mr Big in his office.
once we stepped inside his office we felt the heat.
It was as if someone turned off the air conditioner.
He looks furious.
He tried to smile when we entered but somehow the
smile was not as sweet as usual. All of us comes in...
spread out around him so that should he starts to
draw out a gun n start shooting, all of us would be in
the line of fire.

'why?' as if a dragon growling in a low tone voice.
none of us answered.
'you do know how deep we are right now right?'
'now the delivery is already on the way, how am i going
to answer to the US side?
'Pocket!! have u scold Mr M for this issue!!?'
The volume is at 5 now... if it goes to 10, our ears will bleed.
I didnt answered.
'have u called them to come here!!?' ask Mr Big,

'aa.. no.. not yet' i said fluttering.

'now thats your mistake there pocket!! u are getting blasted
by me ere, your job is on the line and u still let Mr M stays in
SP sitting in his favorite chair listening to his favorite music...'
griming
'now i dont care if u have to shout to him on the phone,
eye to eye, what ever but he have to feel the heat we are
facing right now!! but just dont do it like a truck driver scolding
a dog!! do professionally.'
bong!! bong!! bong!! the table was pounded by Mr Big so hard
that i think he must have hurt his hand doing it.
'u've become soft... your quality control has gone softer these days...
your grip is slipping' This one is for all of us...
the room turns to a silent space for a while.
Mr Big paused his lecture
no one dare to speak...
it was soo quite that i think the sounds of the air condition must
have sounded noisy.

and then....
peeee peeee peeee pet!! pe pe pe pe pe pet!!
peeee peeee peeee pet!! pe pe pe pe pe pet!!

the saiful apek song ...
aspalela was on the air from someone's handphone....
it was soo loud that the secretary turn her head to look
inside the office searching for the sound origin.
i had the urge to smile, but i just couldnt...
'tukar' Mr Big warned the handphone owner.
No Intonation, no feelings,
'it doesnt reflect your credibility as a good.... bla bla bla bla... '
and the lectures goes on till 30 minutes.

hahahahah.... when we got out, we couldnt keep it anymore...
we laughed at the Handphone owner and starts to mimic the
sound of the songs intro. hahahah
had a good laugh by the end of the day :D