Friday, August 31, 2012

575. MengarutlahPocket!


Pocketeers,
its been a while since i've posted anything
in full english. I was hoping to write something
in english today but then again,
somehow i cant find the best word
as an ending to my 'thoughts'
below other then ...MENGARUTLAH POCKET!!

-Every year we feared the HARI RAYA as it is
the time for us to be spending money more and
more... I remember one time, I checked my RAYA
cost me about RM700!! adoi adoi...
so after a few review and brainstorming,
I have come up with a brilliant idea for cost
saving on the baju raya.

Take me and FARID as example,
this year, I'm buying green as my baju raya,
Farrid will be buying blue.
wear it once or twice this year..
and give it to Farid for him to wear
next year. And of course, Farid's baju
raya will be mine next year so I'll be
wearing blue next year... and so does Farid,
he'll be wearing green next year.
by doing this, we can save half the price of
a decent baju raya no?
and imagine if I'm doing it with 3 to 4 families,
pergh!! in the end our baju raya
would cost somewhat RM7 per year :D
which save alot no?

MENGARUTLAH POCKET!!
macam la saiz sama... hoh!!
kamu ingat kamu tu kechik?

-As i was watching one of Harry Potter's movie,
the one with the quidditchh lesson and Ron was
becoming the HERO of the day. Something about
Harry 'secret'ly pouring the 'liquid luck' into
Ron's drink.

I was thinking, is'nt it painful to be sitting
on a small pole (the broomstick) zooming here
and there in high speed? I mean have u ever
waited for a friend and sit your ass onto
the pole they planted horizontally in bus stops?
the pain starts to creep in by the sixth minute.

Do u know those 'Basikal Racing'? the pole in the
middle is so high, that if u accidentally slip
and fall on the pole, u can kiss your future
daughter good bye... cause chances are those
area will not be functioning again.
I nearly slipped and nearly hit it there.
pergh!! a good thing it was not a bullseye..
even that, it was so painful, my femur felt
like it was cracked already.
now Harry's broomstick was just as big in size,
how does he sit on a pole like that?


And think! how is hermione or Ginny do it?
with them being a girl and everything...

MENGARuT POCKET!!!

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

574. Baik-Baik Pocket!!


Pocketeers,
pocket ni suka tolong orang, tambah tambah lagi
adik manis yang dahi licin macam cik puteh,
body kechik kechik cam tasha shila dan yang
tak berkira setakat ter'sentuh' sana sini tu.
eh ini bukan baik, ini gatal.

eh tak!! tapi pocket memang baik,
well tak la baik, tapi suka tolong orang :D.. lain tuu!
bukan sahaja kepada pompuan, malah juga kepada
lelaki lelaki berhampiran, housemate pocket
tak sembang ngan jiran kitorang pasal anak anak
diorang baling sampah dlm rumah kami,
tapi pocket tak kisah,
pasal pocket ni baik!!
pocket sembang jer ngan
abang tu, ok jer...
pasal pocket tak kisah pun diorang baling sampah,
Bukan pocket pun yang dok sapu...
housemate pocket yang dok sapu, heheh:D

bukan itu saja, malah pocket bebaru ni wat
pinjaman nak bayar kedit kad.. moga moga
buleh terlepas la dari chengkaman kedit kad
tu pas ni, pasal ada duit lebih,
pocket gi tawarkan wit tu kat kengkawan
berdekatan nak meringankan sikit beban
raya diorang bebaru ni, moga tak la
diorang amik wit raya anak anak diorang
n wat wit dapur for another few days
until gaji.
sampai gitu skali pocket baik tau!!
(Setakat RM50 sorang utk tiga orang
tu apoo lah sangat kan)

Pocket punyer la baik,
sampai pocket dah simpan RM50
utk belanja 4 orang yang akan
ikut pocket menderma darah nanti
awal October.
RM50 makan kat kedai mamak utk
lima orang yg baru lepas derma
darah cukup kot..
yes yes.. memang pocket ni baik.

tapphiii!!!
tak besh tau bila kita ni..
tolong orang tanpa mengharapkan balasan,
lantas di cop bodoh.. di cop baik tak bertempat..
tak lupa jugak dicop 'kutu bodek',
kalau ngan pompuan tu tetap dah!!
di cop nak mengorat. di cop nak menggatal,
(Kalau ngan tasya shila, memang nak menggatal pun)

So terasalah hati ini dengan tohmahan,
terus terasa benci, terus terasa harus berubah!
pocket nak keluar dari imej baik ni,
pocket sudah wat satu kempen di awal tahun 2012 ni,
kempen yang bertajuk 'TEH AIS!'

setiap kali orang ucap terima kasih kat pocket
atas bantuan ikhlas pocket, pocket akan cakap ...
'ingat free ker? teh ais lah wei!!'
orang terimakasih kat pocket tolong
wat report sampai tak jadi cuti ari
jumaat sebelum raya..
'pergh!! ini bukan satu ni!! 
tapi ampat teh ais ni'
Housemate terimakasih kat pocket
tolong singgah beli mee goreng mamak yang
kedai nya jauh menyimpang dari jalan pulang.
'ini teh ais gelas besar ni!!'
although everyone knows that
the teh ais will never be a reality.
Although people know that I really
helped them base on sincerity,
the image slowly fades off...

daaah kena cop materialistik plak..
adohlaaaaaa....
(Paling tak besh sekali bila menggatal tapi 
dicop 'laparkan teh ais' when i am actually 
'laparkan u'.. oh tak beshnyaaa)

Monday, August 27, 2012

573. Hikkik!! Hwikkikk!!


'hikkik.. hikkik!!'
pocket was trying to by some
ice lemon tea to get rid of his hiccup.
'hikkik!.. hikkik!!'
approaching the counter with ice lemon tea
in his hand and some twisties as a balas
dendamm for one whole month of without twisties.
Ramadhan is a month of without twisties nor
any jack and jill potato chips, as it was
rumoured that those junk food will cause u
to dehydrate yourself causing u to drink water
in the toilet.
eheheh (Ko ingat darjah dua dulu ker aper?)

'hikkik!!' the ice lemon tea and twisties was
placed on the counter.
'pam nombor 6 RM40 yer dik... hikkik!!'
the hiccup is starting to embarass him.
'ada kad mesra tak?' (Eh come to think of it,
dia tanya gini ker ari tu yer?)
'tak der.. hikkik!!'
the small frame lady with 'TRAINEE' written
on her nametag was smiling.
'eeeehh... namer kamu TRAINEE yer?'
with TRAI in the middle pronounced
like the word 'TRY'
'waaahh, fancy nyer namer.. 
so kalau sayer nak panggil tu, 
panggil aper yer? aini ker?'

she didnt answer, she just looked at the pocket
and start to verify what was written on her left
chest.
'TRAINEE lah!!' 
Emphasizing on the how it was supposed
to be pronounced. with her blushed cheeks
and an honest smile that could make one
berdebar debar, u could almost heard your
heart beat pumping. or atleast pocket did.

'ooo traineeeee...' like pocket was born
where english was a foreign language for
him (Yes he is)

and they talked.. and chuckled a bit,
nutting fancy just the usual get to know questions..
and before the whole conversation ended,
pocket managed to get the TRAINEE's real name
which was suhaila, a student doing part time
from somewhere south. ooooo...
Phone number was left to be asked
in his second encounter with suhaila,
that is if she remembers him then...

as pocket was walking out of the
PETRONAS convenience shop
(Orang panggil aper yer),
he just realized...
he found another cure for hiccup other
then drinking upside down, getting spooked
or chanting 'buaya makan katak!buaya makan katak'

it is called 'FLIRTING WITH A TOTAL STRANGER'

and at the moment... it worked!
heheheh...


I bet everyone is starting to work already?
how was the trip back? hideous ha?

Saturday, August 25, 2012

572. Halalkan Makan Minum,

Pocketeers,
Raya mood is still in the air,
lagu raya is not decorating the radio frequency
anymore but there is still a lot of rumah terbuka
and kueh raya scent lingering in the air.
ohh... tak der sesapa nak ajak pocket gi
rumah terbuka ker? the truth is,
pocket never went to any rumah terbuka for raya.
once i went for a rumah terbuka by
NasikKandar Joint's owner...
it was held in the padang sekolah! pergh!!
The feeling was more to bertandang
ke padang sekolah makan nasik kandar free...
rumah terbuka? mana ader rumah? kejam kan?

Masa beraya kita hulurkan tangan berjabat salam,
kiss sikit n mintak mahap, mintak halal makan minum.
yes yes.. masa sekolah dulu banyak sangat 'termakan'
maggi kawan or 'terminum' milo member yang dia dah
siap buat, letak atas meja study but came back 'kering'.
Nak wat camana beb.. musim panas..
lopak lopak air tersejat woo!!
(Iyooolah tu alasan)

'mintak mahap, terlebih kurang mintak halalkan yer'
was the template that everyone uses.
my reply usually would be...
'yang aku tahu aku halalkan,
yang aku tak tahu.. sila bayar yer :)'
iyer lah kan, maner la tahu..
dia curik motor kita awaltahun,
kita punya la merana tak dak motor
nak gi keja.. then by raya mintak halal.
kang kalau kita halalkan, 'terlepas' lah dia kan?
(Although we know.. god knows better)

or once kita bagi dia pinjam RM100
lama tak bayar, kita pun lupa dah...
si anu ni plak nak amik kesempatan
tak nak bayar,
'mintak halal yang terlebih
terkurang.. teramik terberi'
oooooooooiiiihhhh mana buleh!!
dah la nak survive sampai 1sept ni pun mengeliat
atas tanah mengorek bawah rumput lalang dalam
laman mengharapkan sekeping dua siling yang kita
sendiri terjatuhkan 3 tahun lepas.
moga buleh makan sehari dua lagi
kat canteen kilang. lagi nak bagi free?
no way!!!

so pocketeers,
masa raya ni marilah kita bermaaf maafan moga
suci murni hati ini. kalau pun kita wat salah,
gunakan lah hari raya sebagai alasan nak
mintak mahap, tak la segan sangat.
kalau ari biasa makcik tu lalu tepi pun kepala
ditoleh ke tempat lain.. punya la segan.
Memanglah!! hang gi ngorat anak dia,
usung sana sini tapi last last tak jadi.
So Raya ni buleh la nak mintak mahap,
tak lah nak pegi department dia nak kena
riki dulu... 'makcik jongang ader tak?'
kalau ader kita tak gi,
ohh susahnya nak wat keja.

taaapphhiii!! yang terlebih terkurang setakat
yang kita tahu kita halalkan dan mintak dihalalkan.
yang kita tak tahu.. sila bagitau dulu,
then kita pikir balik nak halalkan ker tak :D
(Apoooo lah pocket nih!!)

Thursday, August 23, 2012

571. Eh Laa!!


Pocketeers,
Raya sudah pun berlalu,
sumer orang dah start gi keja...
with a tupperware full of kueh raya's
leftover. Pocket pun bawak jugak!
bukan pasal baik hati lagi nak share ngan orang.
Tapi pasal pocket nak join majlis makan makan
kueh raya private dan dengan selamba rock nyer
makan cik puteh punyer kueh raya.
Tak der la nampak macam
buruk sangat kan...
'I pun bawak!!' chenggitu :D

Cik Puteh punyer kueh rayer mesti sedap!!
dia buat sendiri kalu laaagi sedap!!...........GATAL!!

so lepas raya ni banyak la keluhan keluhan
dari kengkawan pocket yang most of them are men
with less interest in what are the color of langsir raya.
talking with them made me realize..
that money plays a major role in ensuring
a bright and colorful raya.
If its not for himself,
it'll be for his family.

and of course...
listening to their keluhan can
sometime be interesting...
not to forget revolting.

1) 'pergh!! raya tahun ni abih banyak siot! 
memang sengsara nak tunggu gaji 1Sept, 
nasib baik ada duit raya anak anak...' 
eh laaa!! abih anak anak hang tu kira macam
'Denak' ayam hutan la!? untuk attract rezeki?
adohlaaa...
(Tak nak maki sangat, takut
pocket pun jadi begini jgak nanti)

2) on the phone...
'eh sayang.. duit raya abih distribute dah?
berapa abih yer tahun ni?' 
eh laaa!! bukan ikhlas bagi dari hati ker?

3) 'nyesal aku pegi umah mak menakan belah 
laki sepupu kaklong besan nya adik ipar aku 
tu tahun nih, askar nyer ramai sangat!!'
eh laaa!! bagi la lima kupang jer ker..
tak pun dua kupang bagi dua kepin...




yes yes... memang duit memainkan peranan penting
dalam perayaan kita, tapi jangan la sampai kerana duit,
raya kita dibenci, diharapkan berlalu cepat atau digeruni,
'Alaa raya nak sampai dah..
impact raya tahun lepas pun
tak settle lagi dah nak raya dah?'


starting from next year kita jangan bagi wit dah nak?
kita bagi kiss!! and bukan yang tua yang bagi...
yang tua plak yang dapat :D
(Iyer la, saper nak kiss from an old and crusted lips
that u dont where have it been for the last 40 years kan?)


so kepada blogger blogger yang muda lagi chomel,
sila bagitau alamat anda. Pocket usahakan gi beraya
tahun depan :D hoyeah!!

GATALL!!

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

570. RayaFirst Post

Pocketeers,
For me the raya has ended..
although the 'CutiRaya' is still for another few days,
but here I am, working.
adehlaaa...

looked through the whole 81 pcs
of picture that I took... there was
no picture of me that is
'Up-To-The-Blog'... most of them
are me chewing, getting ready for
the semayang raya and there was
this one making a funny faces
eating 'AMPLANG' .

so this is my only 'Good-Enough'
photo with my baju raya from
HariHari supermarket. heheheh..
terpotong separuh la
pulaaaakkkkk...
oh the chics on the right?
she's a dear sister from another
mother who's father was different
from mine. but we luv her the same :D

so how are U Pocketeers? still raya?
I know in my heart I am,
(Even though i have to be at the office already)


Friday, August 17, 2012

569. White Christmas... EH?

Pocketeers,
eh dah nak raya dah!!
the time where we would once a year be clad in baju baru
and rambut nan indah has come again. And yes.. not to
forget the time where we would be spending more and more.

this morning i came to work as usual,
and Cik Puteh also came in about the same
time as i did, i saw her mengedik gedikkan
beg dan kunci kat tempat kasut, alaaaa...
kiter tahu cik puteh.. kamu nak tunggu abang kan?
and just as what i thought, by the time i reached
her area, as swift as she could she took her shoes
and wore em just in time to walk 'saing' with me:D
heheh tahu tahu...

we talked until the junction to separate
our department, about balik raya mostly.
and she replied about her daughter
nursery is already off today so she
have to take half day... ooooooooo
alaaaaaaaaaa....

anyhow.. to cik puteh,
u made my day la sis :D


oh oh!! this would be the last post for
this ramadan, i'll post again by the third of shawal...
if i am not too bloated with ketupat and rendang till
i cant sit up and menaip of course :D

so herewith,
pocket memohon maaf kalau ter'maki' or terkomen pedas
di blog anda, anda dan anda...
mintak mahap la yer, tak sengaja tuu..
kalau sengaja pun,, berniat baik tuu..

dan tak lupa juga nak ku ucapkan,
SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI,
nanti jangan lupa taruk POST baju raya kamu yer :D





Malam ni nak bertolak ke kampung.
harapnya tak la jam sangat. kalau 
jam pun, sikit sikit dah la yer.. penat 
pakcik ni :D
(Tapi tak per, senyuman cik puteh
pagi tadi masih terpahat di otak ni ^^)

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

568, Iklan Silky White Duluuuuuu

Pocketeers,
satu tika dulu, pocket pernah post
207.IklanSilkyWhite dimana pocket
dok review satu iklan ni yang idea nyer
tak la kisah sangat.. just bekenan kat
saripah amani tu jer :D
(Anyone with the same hair as below,
please raise your hand and send me the
address... nak antar rombongan ^^)

Iklan tu bagi teori.. kalau nak tengok
bakal isteri camana jadinya 20 tahun akan datang,
would best be referred to how her mother turned
out now.  Now I did not believe this idea at first,
but as time goes by I've came to see the truth
in this theory. Sorang kawan ni, 10 tahun lepas
punya la comey kecik lagi gedik... kenal dia dengan
mak dia sekali. Back then mak dia macam biasa lah..
kembang sikit sini sana, tapi masih indah pasal dia jaga.
and bertudung with full sopan santun bila sembang,
lawak rabung jugak... cuma with borderline kept
with strict discipline.

Sekarang.... kawan tu pun dah jadi gitu dah sikit sikit.

Ada sorang kawan ni plak... memang comel, kechik
lagi bertudung n 'malu malu ah' 10 tahun lepas, ngan mata
yang nakal tu, memang tergugat jantung jantan mana pun
bila dia 'tembak' sekali wink dia tu. adehlaaa...

Once pocket gi kenduri kahwin kakak dia, and jumpa
la ngan mak dia... mak oih!! mak dia tak kembang,
tapi muluuuuttttt... best describe as 'tak terjaga' sangat
dari menyakitkan ati orang. Dengan kita yang first time
gi kenduri ni pun dah buleh terasa dah....

Guess What? 6 years ago she came to marry some other
guy I dont know, and now she came as near as how I'd
describe her mother then ... 'Mulut haaaaannnnggggg'

Question is... lets consider that this theory or rumor,
or tips on how to choose your wife is true,
'to know how your wife will be after 10 or 20 years of
marriage is by knowing how her mother now.'
now if this is true and we are hoping that we dont wake
up one morning 20 years from now and cursing our self
for making such an idiotic choice earlier in life.
Would we break with her 20 years ago?

dah tu kalau tengok mak nyer tak seberapa
takkan nak mintak break?
Tapi kalau tak mintak break... nak tunggu nanti
bila dah kawin nanti, adinda yang berwajah indah
itu berubah menjadi makcik yg jaga kain orang,
korek taik pusat dpan khalayak...
n kutip biskut tepi pintu n makan..
pun tak bagus gak kan..
(mulut haaannnggg... )

so camana?
baik ajak break sekarang? or lets wait and try to
build a better future hoping that she would turn
out differently with our guidance?
kalau pasal perangai jer tak per...
selalunya perangai come with appearance...
tang appearance tu susah nak kachau tuu :D

Pocketeers?

Monday, August 13, 2012

567. Roti le Stor


pocketeers,
Story are history,
from history u'll learn that decision must not be
made base from your friends decision. yes u can
take their opinions but do not follow them just
because they choose so. history tells u those, and u follow.
failure to follow actually causes your neck.

story are history,
that was meant to be told again and again so that the
words will be etched on the wall of your sticky and
wet brain that stupid enough to maki her to the extend
of no forgiveness.
'u penipu! I hate u! if u ever got married after this,
Sure as heaven and hell your hubby will lie to you about
his 'other-wife', and so will your offspring lying to you
about their early sex when they're just 13.. and then ..
13years from now, u will remember me with this words...
all because of u lied to me today,
I will delete your handphone no right after this hoping
that U will never contaminate my air with your lying
breath.hoh!!'
moral: jangan maki orang belebih lebih sangat okeh..

Story are history,
to be written down so that u can let new generations
people know about how a person is, how do u think
we ever came to know about our RasulAllah?
tru the story told and written, read and reread for us to know.
Story about pak sahak, maktuk's daddy,
who was born in penang and left the island due to
family feud. kalau la pak sahak tak tinggalkan
Penang, pocket mungkin ada tanah sikit disana sekarang.
pergh!! kita jual n beli bot jom?
buleh mancing kat kenyir ngan speed boat sndiri!
fuiyoo!!

story are history,
stori a histeri
sroti la isteri..
seroti lai steri
se roti le stor
laa dah jadi roti plak? tak paham pocket

itu dia intro untuk minggu terakhir sebelum shawal,
kengkawan dah beli mercun dah? tak yah beli..
bakar duit jer suma tu. baik wat makan :D

Saturday, August 11, 2012

566. Your Wife's FatherInLaw's Only Son

Pocketeers,
A friend of mine is having a dilema,
he is about to get married, his mother in law
are hoping for him to move in with his wife family,
living together like one happy family.
But so does his wife's future Father In Law....
prefer his son live with them for the time being
until they have the money to buy themselves
a house. (Pergh!! apa punya complicated daa)

and so he asked me what should he do?
he cant say no as it was his father who requested.
Her wife cant say no... as her mother was hoping.

and so i told him a story about how straight forward
another friend of mine told me. Its kinda harsh but
it worked.

Farid was about to get married to a beautiful lady
back in the early 90s. He could not afford a house
yet so he is renting with his housemates. the usual
bujang life with motor kapchai parked outside and
slipar berterabur. The whole plan of renting a house
after the vow came to his future brother in law...
which is also the WALI.(his wife are 'fatherless')
'alaaa.. kamu tak yah la dok menyewaa.. dok jer 
kat umah si IMA tu, bukan ader saper.. ada mak 
jer poon..' the WALI persuaded.
'err, tapi sayer rase baik tak yah lah, kang menganggu 
mak plak.. tak per.. kami menyewa jer' was FARID
cute excuse,

and the WALI start to tell stories about those who
have failed and those who ends up owning nothing
as they are not well equipped with savings and high
paying salary. FARID was just listening with the
usual 'humm.. iyer?.. ahhaaa.. heheheh' and a few
chuckles.

after a while, FARID realize that there was an udang
di sebalik mee! The WALI did not want his mother
to be left alone after FARID marrying his Sister...
the last of his mothers daughter. OOOOoooooo...
jadi kamu nak suruh kami jaga mak kamu la niiii...

'... hang nak balik pukui berapa pun, tak kisah punya, 
mak tidoq bilik dia, dalam bilik dia lengkap tv lagi,
so jangan la risau... dok umah IMA yer, buleh tengok
tengokkan mak sekalii' was his last word that came
out clean.
The WALI's wife was pouring tea, cucur udang was
cut cutely with kuah kachang on the side.


Farid need to find an excuse,
'tak per lah pikir dulu' is not enough already,
this guy kept on pushing him hard, asking date
to move in and the whole 'your room will be this and that'
an excuse!! how!! what!! something..
and FARID blurted out the reason that is the whole
point of this story. The WALI understood there and
then and no persuasion coming out of his mouth
anymore. it worked for FARID,
I wonder if it will work for U....
If u have the same problem or question...
what if u say this...

'err.. tak per la abang, sayer ni bukan nya tak nak, 
tapi nanti susah la bila tiba hal hal privacy tuu... 
tak leh nak ehem ehem kat ruang tamu sambil tengok tv,
nak ber'soundtrack' sakan pun kena la hati hati kan.... '



'buhukk buhukk, ehek ehek!!' was the sound of
sang kakak tersedak cucur udang.. pergh!! hang
memang tera la FARID.

Tuesday, August 07, 2012

565. Dreaming Small


Pocketeers,
how are u?
bayar zakat dah?
tukar duit dah?
dapat baju raya dah?
today I am going to tell u some of those
small small dreams that I have...
None of it a reality yet.
hopefully one day,
I may be lucky enough and...

- be able to shop in carrefour or any other
local supermarket that sells groceries with
trolleys full of 'things'. So full, if she put on
some biskut recklessly, it would fall to the
ground.
U know those feeling of a family man
buying stuff for his family, beras 10kg,
milo.. susu 28tin.. and well other stuff...
cause right now I am still waiting in line
at the express lane.. for customers with
less then 10 item..
ohh.. jelesnyaa..

- be able to buy stuff or let her buy stuff
without us enquiring the price that much.
And enough of those bad habit of making
a surprise look when I was told that the
diamond ring cost 14 times of my salary...
'abang nak ni?'
'amik lah'
or something like that...
bangang kan.. I know.


- be able cook properly,
so good that I could whip something up
miraculously... like if I'm camping somewhere
in the middle of hutan simpan or by the beach
somewhere remote, the crowd went away for their
jungle tracking leaving those with bad knees
and aching ankle at the camp like me to cook.
By the time the crowd reached back, there was I..
rendering the last icing flower
on my kek tiga tingkat.
'waahhh!! how on earth!!'
'fullaweiii pocket terer masak siot!!'
'mana dapat oven!!?'
Loh!! how do i ever cook cake out there
in the jungle dont ask laa... its a dream remember...
a hope, a fantasy...

Small small dreams kan,
how about u pocketeers?
any small small dreams u had lately?




-be able to marry 
her, her, her and her. 
heheh, All living happily 
together with my 28
sons and daughters 
under one roof.
pergh!! ni tak kecik 
ni pocket!! hoih!!
Turun ke bumi!! 
turun!!!

Monday, August 06, 2012

564. Biasa Biasa aja..

Pocketeers,
pocket bebaru ni dok layan tv..
entah kenapa ternampak lak vdo clip
cik NajwaLatiff kita tu nyanyi ngan dua mamat ni.
ok jgak la diorang 'chanting' perkataan yang sama
jer dari awal sampai abis..
saper buleh jawab.. berapa banyak 'untuk-dia'
yang diorang sebut?

maa still catchy :D


part yang besh nyer is... the first verse that sis Najwa
was singing... her voice was as usual, not like siti
with all pulun and menyakitkan tekak trying to hit
the correct pitch. Hers was more relaxed.
Anyway her verse was ...
'mungkin kau lihat ku banyak berbelanja
tapi sebenarnya ku biasa biasa saja'

ohh sis, on what standard are your referring to?
having 17 pair of shoes per quater year and
another 17 for the next quater is 'biasa biasa saja' for some,
but nor for most, not for another 70% of hardworking labor
out there trying to make a living :D
sis.. all three of u are driving topless..
eh silap!!
itu maknanya sudah jadi lain,
all three of u are driving a 'bumbung'less car
and u'r saying 'biasa biasa' saja?
is a bit worrying for us who drive
wira and still thinking its a babe magnet.

let me tell u kids out there...
in my factory there is about 2000 people working.
about 100 person only having basic salary of more then 2K,
which 50 of them are more then 3 and can goes up to 6 to 7...

if u talk about 'biasa' then u'r suppose to be from those
1900 people who are getting less then 1k of sallary.
tell me? how to pay insurance for your kids la with 1k of sallary?
rumah jer pun dah RM700, keter lagi RM400...
makan aper !? astro lagi... heheh:)

my point is... video kamu menyesatkan sis :D
(Menyesatkan pun, tp kamu comel so tak per)
kanak kanak zaman akan datang akan pikir
the colorful life that u portraying in your vdo
is actually what they'll be having when they
grow up... when it is not. well maybe yes,
only for 3% of youngsters today.

terus teringat 'SlumdogMilionaire'

Saturday, August 04, 2012

562. Ayam Goreng RM2.5

Short Post dipetang sabtu,
dillema dihari raya,

bila raya kita bagi wit raya,
ikhlas, tulus dari hati..
'Moga duit ni buleh membantu kamu wahai anak muda,
dalam me'realisasi'kan impian kamu utk menjadi tahfiz,
menjadi arkitek pembina masjid, utk menjadi guru
harapan generasi yang lebih muda.'

yes yes, kita memang bagi ikhlas tulus dari hati,
its not about the amount, its not about who u are,
ikhlas ikhlas...

taaaappiii!!!
jangan nak tipu yer disini pocketeers sekalian kalau
pocket cakap ada yang jeles kekanda bagi banyak
dari kamu,  persoalan of
'kenapa pak ngah bagi ciput walhal dia gaji besor?'
well tak perlu la pakngah nak bagi penerangan kan
-pakngah kaki judi,
-pakngah kaki karaoke ngan indon,
-pakngah kaki makan (Pasal tu pakngah 'besar' sikit)

tapi tanpa explanation pun, assumption mesti kuar.
pak long bagi RM10.. pak ngah bari RM2 jer!?
mesti pakngah dok perabih wit kat manching sangat
sampai tak der wit dah nak buat bagi wit raya...
no? betul betul no? betul ker?

n thinking of this, kita pun mesti terpikir kan,
nak bagi wit raya berapa yek? yang tak nampak
kedekut sangat, tp still termampu dek gaji ciput ini.

Daaan disini pocketeers sekalian pun jawab la ngan
jawaban yg macho macho lagi berunsurkan moral
tahap kayangan...
'beb, sedekah tu, maner buleh pikir amount'
'alaa yang penting niat kamu'

tapi jauh disudut hati itu,
tak pernah terpikir kah?
sikit pun tak pernah terpikir kah?
tahun ni berapa? RM2 lagi cam tahun lepas?
kak long bagi berapa tahun lepas? tak segan ker?
Acu bagi Rm200 sorang utk anak menakan,
kamu bagi RM2? biar betul?

heheheheh... daaahhh!! jom gi pasar ramadan!
carik ayam goreng :D

561. The One That Got Away...

Pocketeers,
how was your puasa?
for the man,
please go and pay up your zakat fitrah,
cause u dont wanna kalut kalut malam
raya bila masa tu lah nak balik kampung
pun... masa tu jgak lah nak tulung pak
bakaq lemang nya pun, main mercun
plak nya lagi, laaaaagi nak pi bayaq
zakat?
huuuiiii tak dan woo!! :D

anyway kenangan is just as painful
as any poke with a sharp knife to the
lower rib right? Just now i was checking
back all those picture in my computer,
and saw some picture of her, her and her...
its like that song saper nyanyi?
its all coming baaack, its  coming back to me now,
bla bla blaaa...
its when u touch me like this,
it when i hit u like that,
saper nyanyi yer? kakak yang bebaru ni meninggal tu ker?

adehlaaa...
terasa terus nak mempersoalkan ketentuan tuhan,
terasa teringin nak tanya... what if this, and what if that...
terasa terus bahawa.. mungkinkah ada yang lebih baik?
maybe pocket patut gi USA dari gi Papua NewGunea dulu
untuk sambung study?
or maybe kalau pocket dok jer kat MY, mesti sekarang ni
pocket tak senang duduk pasal banyak sangat aweks
seluruh negeri negeri bersekutu kat malaysia ni.
(Macam kamu tu ensem sangat jer pocket!!!?)
hehehh, tak tak.. nak dapat kan yang pertama dulu
pun puas makan modal, inikan plak yang kedua..
malah yang ketiga ... ohhh

nak ajer pocket group semua gambar gambar tu n tekan button delete.
tapi tak sampai ati, terasa macam nak tengok lagi.. macam nak 'ingat'
lagi...
yes yes, kita mungkin tak di'tentu'kan bersama,
tapi aku kan cuba untuk mengingati dirimu selama lamanya.
kalau kenangan indah kita tak dapat ku cerita lagi dan lagi untuk
ku pahatkan di otak lembab ku ini, maka gambar gambar ngan
henpon murahan yang saiz tak sampai 2000pixel persegi ni jer lah
jadi reminder. yang satu tika dulu aku dah buat silap (KOT?)
yang kalau la buleh ku ulang, akan ku buat sebaik mungkin.
pergh!! jiwang nya post pocket kali nih.. adehlaaaa...

so untuk kamu yang membaca...
just want u to know that i miss u,
not to wish that we could be together anymore,
just wanna hear your voice every now and then
to remind me about 'the one that got away'

Thursday, August 02, 2012

560. Antisocial Statement.


Pocketeers,
do u hate anyone?
do u despise someone till the point '
that u wont talk to him, if u sees him
all small walking towards u from the other
end of the hall, and u'd change your step
and start walking out another door?
Do u put the 'silence-ring-tone'
as a ring tone for him, so that
u'll never realize him calling.

I guess u do, everyone do...
its just a matter of much or less,

Now how did we ever came to this,
I hate her, because?
I truly dont think its because of her
face... yes, she may look like those
'Ibu Mertuaku' kinda face that u'll
feel meluat just by the glimpse of
her nose.. or her mulut munchung,
but I dont think u'll hate her for her
face. unless she looks just like that
bitch who left u for another guy after
she finished 'kikis'ing all of your
simpanan till u are now merempat
di bawah titi berselimutkan kotak..
well then just stab her the next time
u see her will ya..

Which brings me to the real point
of my stupid argument today.

we will never hate someone..
who we've never luved before.

its like related. u love someone,
and chances are u can hate him after.
but if u never luv anyone, definitely
u'll never hate anyone after.
why would u hate that penjual surat kabar?
He gave u the wrong change?
He talked rubish to you?
So what? u dont know him, let him be!
He'll never get any.. he can look at you
for all he wants or care to imagine what
is going on under those slick silk baju kurong
of yours, but he'll never get any close to u
other then his filthy hands handing u the change.


But if u and him have been going on for so long,
talking about your kids and your hubby with
the penjual surat kabar, he knows your car and
start runnin hastily to give u your choice of
surat kabar just by u stopping nearby his stall.
u know his house, and he knows yours.
Raya visits, doa selamat and even BBQs.
Then wont u be hurt if he ever talk rubbish or
if he brushes his forearms by your waist like
trying to seduce u hoping to get lucky?

Chances are, u'll never go there again.

If I forgot to reply an SMS to the clerk in my office,
i dont think she minds (unless its an emergency SMS saying..
'tolong! macam ada orang pecah masuk rumah saya')
but if I forgot to reply my intan payung's sms repeatedly,
then it'll be a cold weekend with FB update
'cinta oh cinta.. dimana kamuuuu' bla bla meluat!

U once known a guy,
he turned out nice, u started dating,
u liked him, he seems like luving u...
but then after a few dates he started
to ask money from u and rumours lingering
that he actually having some other girls,
and u are one 'dinner' that he's having lined
up for the weekend. Finding this true,
u broke up with him. (After the kokakola
dituangkan ke kepala dia pasal tangan tu
gatal sangat merayap kat tpt tak sepatutnya)
would u hate him after? for deceiving u?
for thinking less of u? I'd say I would.
but in men's point of view, we're different.
we dont mind becoming 'dinner'
but that is a different story of course.

Now it doesnt have to be lovey dovey relation only,
Bosses whom u care.. turned out that he's just as
racist as everyone say he is,
A fishing buddy whom u thought glad of your company
but turned out telling people how he hated going
fishing with a newbie like u.
or a blogger whom u thought having something in
common but turned out she just wanted your traffic.

Anything Everything Something Urat Keting,

we will never hate someone..
who we've never luved before.
for a life without any hatred,
let us not love. an antisocial statement.

A racist head of department? hey go ahead! dont kacau me ok
A random guy stopping by the traffic light with fishing rods?
let him be, banyak dpt ikan bro?
'adoo lah sikit' 'oooo' bruuuuuummmmmmmmm

no?



what do u think pocketeers?